The Unexpected
by AmyaEnvyElric
Summary: Al has just discovered that his brother and Envy are together. He of course doesnt take it to well, and he gets even more angry when children become involved.Warnings: Mpreg, Minor violence,Language, Edvy, AlXWrath major Winry bashing dont like dont read
1. Ed and Envy?

Hehe I am back!

Jazz(baby sister): Took you long enough -_-

Ohh you just shut up nobody asked you for your snippy comment Jasmine :P

Jazz: I know but I decided to give it anyway

Yeah I noticed

Jazz: Hmph just because Tosha's birthday came up didn't mean u could take a vaction

Hmph my ass I had to deal with her unlike you who got to stay home

Jazz: *smirks* I know it was nice not hearing either of you J

You suck

Jazz: Blow me

….You're boy?

Jazz: GO DIE KEN! (runs out of the room slamming the door)

Hehe I knew that would get rid of her anyway this is the new EdXEnvy story I will be working on since I am currently having writers block (damn you) with my other two stories here it is the first chapter

Pairings: EdXEnvy, AlXWrath, minor AlXWinry

Warinings: Language, OOC, Mpreg, Minor Violence, Lemons possibly

Dislcaimer: I do not own FMA I have made requests to Arakawa-senpai (not really) but no such luck

_Chapter 1 Ed and Envy…?

"Al you sure Ed said it was okay to come vist?" Winry asked as she and Alphonse walked through East City looking for Al's older brother's apartment "Yeah Winry, brother said it was alright, he wasn't having any company other then you and me" Al said looking at his best friend since childhood.

Winry sighed looking at the paper with Ed's adress labeled on it, "87 Wetstone Road, it should be that way" she said pointing out the street. When they found it, the sun was just beginning to set and they found the lights off.

"Al maybe he's not home yet" Alphonse shook his head knocking on the door when he noticed it wasn't locked he pushed it open feeling through the dark for the lightswtich. He found it and clicked the light on, Winry looked around noticing Ed's house was actually preety clean, compared to how the man used to take care of things when he and Al used to live together in the Military dorms.

Then she went into the bathroom noticing something that shouldn't be there, a bottle of female hormones um? "Al come look at this" said boy walked into the bathroom and saw the bottle blinking repeadtly then blushing like a tomatoe. "Those cant be brother, maybe there his girlfriends or something" well he was half right.

Then they heard a thud from the room above them, they both looked at each other nodding. Alphonse climbed the staris looking at the bedroom door, he looked to Winry she nodded slowly and with a twist of his wrist the door knob twisted and he pushed the door open. The room was dark so he had to fumble around till he found the switch, when he fliped it they both looked over at the bed and saw Edward fast asleep with his arm around someone.

They inched closer and both of them flinched in the bed with Ed's arm around him was none other then Envy. Or at least they thought it was Envy the person in the bed had Envy's muscular body but the face seemed more womanly and they knew Envy was male or at least they thought he was a man you could never tell with the gender confused palm tree.

Winry gasped faintly inching away from the bed, Al gagged trying to keep quiet. Suddenly a half moan and groan came from the green haired form under the sheets, Envy lifted himself up and yawned. But then he stiffened he turned around to see Winry and Al both gaping at him like fish out of water.

"WHAT THE HELL WHY ARE YOU TWO HERE?" he/she shouted loud enough to wake the dead, Winry squeaked while Alphonse glared "I could ask you the same question!" he snapped this woke Ed up however. The blonde sat up looking around and then his eyes became wide and he flew out of the bed landing on his head Winry screamed because Ed was naked as the day he was born.

She fainted landing with a loud thud, Envy glared at her unconscious form. "Dramatic much?" he grumbled Al hissed "Why are you naked brother? AND WHY IS HE IN YOU'RE BED?" Ed blushed while rubbing his aching head "We're dating" was the simple reply from the homunculus sitting on the bed with the sheets wrapped around his lower half.

"I CAN SEE THAT AND JUST SHUT UP THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND MY BROTHER!" Al growled baring his teeth. Ed climbed to his feet grabbing his underwear which had been forgotten on the near by arm chair, "Al seriously calm down ok!" he said when he at least had something covering himself.

Al breathed deeply through his nostrils "Ok Ed, but could you explain why you and _him _are dating?" Envy got up from the bed picking up a robe from the floor and putting it on then striding over to his chibi. The blonde took Envy's hand "We been together for awhile now, since I got our bodies back" the younger blonde growled "That's not what I meant Ed" Envy sighed "Its hard to explain even smaller pipsqueak but to make a long story short we're together now, we will be together till our dying days and theres nothing you can do but except it" he grumbled tiredly.

The youngest Elric sighed in defeat "Fine I give up" they all heard a groan from behind Al who gasped they had completely forgotten about the knocked out Winry on the floor. Envy sighed again sitting on the floor Al blinked "Whats wrong with you?" the green haired homunculus looked up with a drain expression and his face was green. "I'm sick and its getting about time for me… for me" he groaned and botled out of the room and into the connected bathroom slamming the door shut.

Ed sighed and followed his lover, Al put Winry on the bed and followed his older brother and he heard something he wished he hadn't Envy was throwing up just about everything humanly or homunculus ly possible. Every retch made the homunculus's head burrow further and futher into the toilet "Brother whats wrong with him?" he asked while wincing as he saw the color chunks come out of Envy's mouth.

"I don't know he's been like this for a week now but he wont go to the docters" Ed mumbled while rubbing gental circles in the green haired sins backside and holding his hair back. Al glared "Wow he's as stubborn as you when it comes to docters" Edward chuckled "Yeah that's why we're made for each other" Al smiled a little then finally Envy sat back on his heels with his arms wrapped around his abdomen.

"Ok that's it you're going to the docter's tommarow Envy!" Ed snapped Envy didn't even try to argue as Ed carried him bridal style. "Hey Al, you can put Winry in the guest room and you can sleep on the couch if you want because I'm gonna need help with Envy in the morning" Al nodded.

Al walked back down the staris after he had put Winry to bed, he groand while sitting down. "This is not my day" he grumbled, he just found out his brother's gay and that he is in a relationship with their enime and on top of that Envy was sick and they didn't know if it was life threating or not.

"You think you're day sucked?" a voice mumbled from the corner he flinched looking at the figure who was coming out of the shadows. "Wrath…?" he muttered unsure the person laughed "You remember me? I'm shocked and truly touched" the boy laughed standing in front of Alphonse.

Wrath still looked the same except he was taller and his voice was a bit deeper. "Why are you here?" the blacked haired teen smiled "Because nii-san is here, he's the only family I have left because of you…" the boy trailed off Al flinched he didn't think Wrath would remember that he and Ed had nearly killed Envy but succeded in killing off the rest of the homunculi including Sloth from what they could tell at the time was that he and the female homunculs who resembled their mother had been very close.

"Yo, alchemist boy?" Al snapped out of his daze with Wrath pale hand waving back and forth over his face.

Wrath sighed "Anyway try listening to you're brother and nii-san going at it like rabbits for three hours straight" Alphonse blushed "Wow… that was one thing I could of gone all day with out hearing about" he said the black haired teen mearly laughed again.

This was going to be a long night…

Sooooo…. Good or bad? But seriously be nice about it I don't apprecate flamers and you can bet you're ass I will delate you're review so be nice if you don't like it keep it to you're self don't be a dick.


	2. Doctor's Visit

The Unexpected ch 2 J

Yay I finally have a functioning computer or laptop lolz. Since everybody found this story funny I will have to change the theme to comedy I guess lol. Well you guys already know the warnings so on with the disclaimer.

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING! I CRY ABOUT THIS EVERY NIGHT I WANT AN ENVY PLUSHIE!**

CH 2 Doctor's Visit'

"ENVY GOTDAMMIT COME OUT OF THE BATHROOM!" Ed shouted while banging on the bathroom door which Envy had locked after his visit with the porcelain Gods."FUCK OFF CHIBI!" was the twice as loud reply Ed punched the door again only leaving knicks in the painted white wood. Winry had woken up by then and was stomping out of the guestroom with a sour look on her face, "SHUT THE FUCK UP DAMN IT I WANNA SLEEP FOR ANOTHER 10 MINUTES JERKS!" she screamed throwing her wrench at Ed's golden blonde head. Where she kept the wrench was anyones guess.

A loud clang confirmed a direct hit, and a knocked out Ed on the floor. Envy opened the door and looked out to see his boyfriend out cold with a small bump on the back of his head. He smirked and slithered out of the bathroom and towards their room, he shut the door and laid down on the bed. But he hadn't closed his eyes for 2 minutes when he was hoisted over the shoulder of Alphonse, "PUT ME DOWN CHIBI-TEME!" Envy howled.

"No can do Envy-_san_"

"OH SO NOW YOU ARE GONNA START WITH THE DAMN FORMALITES HUH?"

Envy was beyond irate, he was completely furious. He thrashed and kicked in his boyfriend's younger brother's grip even biting on Al's ear to get him to loosen his grip.

But the younger Elric wouldn't even twitch, then the homunculus got an idea.

Al was walking towards the front door when a bright flash of light blew across the left side of his vision. And then he felt something run across his shoulder and past him he turned around to see a black cat with brilliant purple eyes looking at him with complete mirth written in the dark irises. "ENVY DON'T BROTHER WANTS YOU TO GO TO THE DOCTORS!" Al shouted making a move to grab Envy before he could make a run for it.

But the black cat was already on the move bolting up the stairs and out of sight, but being one not to give up till he wasn't breathing Al slammed his palms down on the ground. And then he felt the horrible tingling as The Gate took something from his body or equivalent exchange as many alchemists preferred to call it. A giant hand flew out of the hard wood and up the stairs, he heard a yowl of anger then the hand retracted back to him in its wooden fingers was Envy.

"Bastard"

"Sorry Envy-_san_"

"Just hurry up and take me to this damn butcher in sheep's clothing!"

Al released Envy from the hand, and escorted him down the front steps and towards the taxi Ed had called for them. Ed was glaring at his boyfriend from his seat in the taxi while Envy merely sat there holding his belly. He didn't feel good again and hoped Ed wouldn't pick a fight till they got to the doctor's office, when the pulled up Edward paid the driver and dragged Envy into the clinic.

"You know Envy we wouldn't of had to go through all of that if you just would of come out of the damn bathroom idiot" Ed grumbled while still pulling said sin by his arm with Al and a pissed off Winry in toe. Envy sat down while Ed went to the secretary, "Excuse me I have an appointment for an Envy Elric" the woman looked up from his magazine "Huh?" she asked Edward's face turned red "I SAID I have an appointment for Envy Elric at 10:00 today!" then aww came over the lady's face "Oh yes that's right, you're couple that has an appointment with Dr. Zita Hamilton correct?" he nodded glaring at her.

"Ok then she will see you right now follow me" she got up from her seat walking toward the double doors Ed motioned with his hands for the others to follow him. They walked into the first office door on the right, Al sat down, Winry stood in the corner while Ed stood beside Envy who sat on the examination table. They waited for a five minutes till a short woman in her late 20's opened the door, she was very pretty with a dark tanned complexion, soft brown eyes and long flowing dark brown hair.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Hamilton but you can just call me Zita" she said flashing a lovely smile, Envy spoke up first "Hurry up and examine me so I can go home!" he snapped Zita nodded not seeming to be affected by his rude behavior.

She examined his head first, then his arms, then his chest, then his legs finding nothing wrong with any of them she moved back up to his stomach. Envy felt the woman stiffen when she reached his abdomen the place where he was having the most trouble.

"Um ok well I did feel something in there, but I don't want to alarm you I don't think its anything serious but just to be sure I will need a blood sample" she said picking a syringe from the table. Zita held his arm and then pushed the small needle into his skin drawing out the dark crimson life force. "Alright that's about it, so explain the symptoms to me" Ed spoke up "He's thrown up for a week now, and he gets to tired" Envy sent daggers towards his lover but then he blanched. His face turned the same color of his namesake and he ran out of the room and towards the nearest bathroom.

"Hmm alright nausea, and tiredness, well I think its just a virus nothing more but I still needed a blood sample just in case" Zita said writing the conversation down on her clip board. "Alright doc so when will the results be in?" Ed asked Zita put her clip board down "In about a few days, I will have Janette make you another appointment for Thursday, is that ok or do you need another day?" he shook his head.

Zita took her leave but not before giving Ed a prescription that would ease Envy's nausea, not holding it back entirely but would at least leave him his dinner. When they walked out of the office and into the hall they found said sin on the ground, with his back against the wall rubbing his lower stomach with a greenish tint in his features.

"You ok koi?" Ed asked crouching down to look Envy in the eyes.

"Do I LOOK alright to you?"

"Stupid question sorry"

"Shove it! Now get me home before I throw up on you!"

Ed helped Envy to his feet, the sin made sure to lean his entire weight on the blonde so if he did throw up, the full metal pipsqueak would get the whole bucket load.

"Ed I can't believe you!" Winry snapped her blue eyes narrowed

Said blonde looked up from caring for his lover to see fiery baby blues looking at him with almost pure hate written the irises. Then a fist flew connecting with the side of the blonde's skull, sending him and Envy smashing to the side of the cab that Al had hailed for the group.

"WHAT THE HELL WINRY?"

"STUPID BLONDE BITCH YOU TRYING TO SEND US PERMENTLY TO THE HOSPITAL?"

Winry huffed and puffed, you could actually see the steam coming out of her nose. (A/N. Imagine Winry mixed with a bull)

"MAYBE YOU CORNER WHORE! BUT NOT ED I LOVE HIM!"

Ed blinked repeatedly "You love me?"

"Yes I love you! MORE THEN THE SLUT HERE DOES THAT HE THREATNES TO THROW UP ON YOU JUST BECAUSE YOU ASKED IF HE WAS ALRIGHT HE IS SO FUCKING UNGRATFUL!"

"Winry-_chan _you need to calm down!" Al shouted

"No I WILL NOT CALM DOWN THAT WHORE NEEDS TO BE KNOCKED DOWN A COUPLE PEGS!" she shrieked

Al grabbed a hold of Winry pinning her to the pavement, "Brother you and Envy-_san _head home I'm gonna handle Winry" Ed nodded loading his sick boyfriend into the back seat of the cab slamming the door closed.

"Go" he ordered the driver who looked beyond pissed at Winry for denting his cab with her crush and his lover's bodies.

"That's some friend you got back there!"

"She's just mad, she'll come around later and sorry I'll pay for the damage sir"

"Hmph fine, now where to?"

"87 Wetstone Road please"

The driver nodded, drove to the set destination.

They pulled up to the large townhouse apartment, Ed got out first handing the driver his pay. Then he hooked Envy arm around his neck then he put his own arm around his boyfriend's waist. "You think you can eat anything? I know you couldn't eat breakfast since you just ended up throwing it back up" the green haired homunculus shrugged as Ed sat him down on the couch.

"I think so, but wont know till I try"

"Yeah but I don't want you throwing up again"

"If I throw up, I throw up chibi now SHUT UP AND GET ME SOMETHING TO EAT NOW DAMMIT!" Envy growled.

Ed made a sound that resembled a mouse squeaking in terror as he bolted for the kitchen. 'What the hell, he was fine now he's having mood swings!' Ed squeaked in his head as he prepared a small salad for Envy knowing the sin didn't care to much for meat.

But when he returned with the salad for his koi, the homunculi growled at the plate.

"Something wrong, you always liked the salad I made?"

"I don't want salad! Go upstairs in my drawer there is bag bring it here!"

The blonde ran quickly up the stairs went into their bedroom, he opened the drawer Envy had described. He pulled out a leather bag, he opened the bag a little and his eyes got wide 'Where the hell did he get these I thought he didn't need these anymore?' he shook his head and went back down the stairs and entered the living room.

But he saw Envy no where in sight he blinked "Envy?" he called but no answer. Nothing but silence that is till he heard the sound of sharp teeth tearing into raw meat. He ran into the kitchen and almost lost his breakfast, "ENVY WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU EATING?" Envy looked up from his meal which happened to be tomorrow's dinner. A plate of raw beef, the sin looked at it "Obviously beef" Ed's left eyebrow twitched "I AM AWARE OF THAT BUT YOU'RE EATING IT RAW AND SINCE WHEN DO YOU EVEN LIKE MEAT!" Envy shrugged.

"Don't know, don't care I got a craving for it, and guess what I couldn't ignore it"

"Ugh go wash your hands! And why do you still have philosopher stones?"

"You're buddy Dr. Marcoh gave them to me, he said I probably would need them and guess what he was right because besides the meat I've been craving stones"

"Well the stones I kinda get but you've never liked meat and all of sudden that's what you want to eat, those results need to get in soon so we can figure out what's going on inside you're stomach that would make you want that!"

Envy grabbed the bag from the blonde dumped a couple of the small ruby stones onto a plate and began chewing them as if his life depended on it.

When the stones were gone he went back to eating the almost gone raw meat. He ignored the blonde as he stared at him dumbfounded. "Take a picture it will last longer" he muttered around a large chunk of the bleeding flesh. When the bloody mess was gone and down inside the sin's belly he sat back against the chair rubbing his lower stomach with a smile of pure satisfaction on his lips.

"Wow…."

"Shut it"

"Just-ugh I can not believe you just sat there and ate all of that raw beef nasty"

Envy licked his lips to remove most of the dried blood, he then sat up but he felt dizzy and sat back down. "Ha I wouldn't be surprised if eating that beef made you dizzy! And if you throw up I swear Envy!" but his words were on deaf ears.

The sin groaned as he tried to clear the black spots dancing about his vision, "Ed-chibi I seriously don't feel good knock it off" he whispered.

Envy tried to get up again and succeeded this time, he walked past his lover and up the stairs. Ed followed him worry etched almost permantly into his features. The green haired homunculus leaned against the wall his palm pressed to his middle as he felt nausea churn strongly sending bile up his throat.

"Chibi get me a buc-bu-bu-buket!"

Ed ran into the bathroom grabbed the wastebasket, he ran back out and gave it to his boyfriend. The sin took it gratefully, the blonde plugged his ears as Envy stomach gave a sickening gurgle and he burped lightly and his lunch made a encore appearance. The sin gagged quietly while trying to keep some of his meal inside his body.

"Envy"

Another heave shook the older boy's frame but finally after there was nothing left for his stomach to expel. Envy let the vomit filled container drop to the floor the pile of sick stained the carpet.

"Bed now!"

"Bu-bu-but" he moaned weakly as the blonde guided him to their bedroom. "No buts" Ed growled as he pushed the sin into bed.

"Get some sleep alright"

"Fine"

"Ok now, I'm gonna go get you some water"

Envy nodded rolling over so he could see the alchemist's back as he descended down the stairs. Just as Ed's feet touched the bottom of the stairs Al and Winry walked into the house, he could feel the hostility coming from Winry she was still mad.

"Hey Al, Winry"

"Hi brother, how's Envy?"

"Hmph who cares about the whore"

"Winry! You PROMISED you would behave"

"I didn't promise a damn thing Alphonse"

"Anyways how is Envy brother?"

"He's got sick again after he ate….." Ed trailed off not wanting to tell his baby brother of Envy's strange taste in food as it is.

"After he ate what?"

"…."

"Brother come on it couldn't of been that bad"

"ED-OTAKU JUST TELL US!" Winry howled

"HE ATE RAW MEAT!

Both Al and Winry stared at him, eyes wide mouths open.

"He ate what?

"Raw meat…" Ed shuddered at the memory of Envy devouring the bleeding corpse.

"DISGUSTING!"

"Yeah we get it Winry shut up"

"WHO ARE YOU TELLING TO SHUT-!"

"Winry enough get over it already ok? Brother loves Envy not you!" Al said calmly.

Winry scowled and stomped off into the living room, all the while pouting. Ed just rolled his golden eyes, while grabbing a glass from the cabinet. He walked over to the sink and filled it up with water.

"You think you can keep Winry out of my hair while I take care of Envy?"

"No problem brother"

"Thanks" and he walked back up the stairs leaving Al alone with the frightening blonde girl in the living room. Well almost all alone when he found Wrath leaning on the couch.

"Hey Wrath-chan"

"Hi"

"How was you're day?"

"It'd been alright if I didn't have to deal with _**her**_!" he snapped jabbing his thumb in Winry's direction. "WHAT ABOUT ME? YOU'RE ABOUT AS MUCH OF A WHORE AS THE CUNT UP STAIRS!" ok that was the last straw.

Wrath grabbed Winry's wrist and flung her against the wall, he smiled when she cried out in pain.

"Haha you like that bitch?"

"FUCK YOU!"

"No thanks I don't date dykes"

"PRICK!" (A/N. Winry has a very dirty mouth O_O)

"DON'T YOU EVER SAY MY BROTHER IS A CUNT AGAIN SLUT!" Wrath snarled throwing Winry's butt out the door.

"Hope you like sleeping outside bitch!"

And he slammed the door in Winry's crimson red face, he laughed but he heard the loud footsteps of Ed running down the stairs. "Wrath what the hell did you do to Winry?"

"She called nii-san a cunt"

"SHE DID WHAT?"

"Nii-san don't start yelling is Envy asleep?"

"Yeah"

"Then you don't want to wake him do you? He needs all the sleep he can get from all the throwing up he's been doing"

"Yeah you're right sorry Al"

"Don't apologize to me if Envy's awake again apologize to him"

Edward slumped back up the stairs with Wrath and Al in toe, he opened the bedroom door but to his relief the sin had slept through the whole melee down stairs. He saw Envy was sweating again, and decided, to pull his boyfriends hair back so that it wouldn't cling to him and make his body temperature rise even more.

"I hope Hamilton knows what's up with him"

"Is nii-san going to be ok?" the younger sin asked quietly.

Al put a palm on his head and smiled "Yeah he'll be ok I'm sure of it" (A/N. Ok there's the little tiny winy hint at AlXWrath, there will be more in the next chapter).

The three watched the green haired homunculi through out the night, but much to their displeasure they could here the faint schreechs of a pissed off Winry banging on the front door all night long.

Ok chapter 2

FINALLY I UPDATED THIS FIC!

Ed: You're insane

Envy: Why did you make me eat that gross

Aww poor baby Envy-chan get over it! MY FIC HAHA I GET TO DO WHAT I WANT TO YOU!

Envy: Bitch

Ed: Yep

WHAT WAS THAT?

Envy: Nothing Kenni-senpai

That's what I thought

Ed: Insane

You should of realized that by now Edo

Anyways there it is a bit long I know nah I don't know if it was that long or not, my computer says 9 pages long is that long? Probably not but who cares at least I finally got ch 2 up and out of the oven J Hope you guys enjoy this I spent 2½ months thinking of how this chapter was going to go so if you like it please R&R but be nice if not go flame elsewhere please

_Signed_

_**AmyaEnvyElric aka Kenni**_


	3. Just Shut Up & Kiss Already!

The Unexpected chapter 3 :D

I would like to thank one of my reviewers for finding this story funny lol which it kinda is XD

Anyways thank you so very much BurningWhiteTwilight for loving this story and if you liked that whole fight between Wrath and Winry well I decided to do this whole chapter about Winry, Wrath and Al but Ed and Envy will show up a little later like towards the end.

ON WITH THE DISCLAIMER!

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing of FMA dammit ;_;**

Ch 3 Just Shut Up & Kiss Already!

The next day after Al convinced his older brother to finally let Winry back in the house, after he made her swear up and down that she wouldn't call Envy anymore names.

"Hey Al you ready to go with me to visit Mrs. Hughes?" Winry asked sitting on the arm of the couch where Al was currently reading an alchemy book.

"Yeah I guess but, after I take Wrath-_chan_ to get some ice cream, Envy-_san_ and nii-san were supposed to take him but Envy-_san _got sick again this morning"

Winry rolled her bright blue eyes in annoyance at Alphonse's growing fascination with the little homunculi. "But Al you promised me while we were on the train here, we would go see her!"

"Things come up Winry"

"You just don't want to go because of me.." she muttered her eyes watering up (A/N. OH GOD HERE COME THE WATER WORKS FOLKS!)

"Winry don't cry please! I swear I will go ok, you can come with me and Wrath to get ice cream to!"

"NO JUST FORGET IT!"

"No I promise I will go, just come with me and Wrath then we can go straight to Ms Gracia's ok"

"O-o-o-o *sob* k"

Al smiled while rising to his feet walking over to the door underneath the stairs knocking.

"Wrath-_chan_ come on!"

The door opened and Wrath came out dressed in a pair of jean shorts and black t-shirt, only because Envy had yelled at him many times to wear a shirt that didn't show his stomach. They had to act like humans there for dress like them he had ordered his baby "brother".

"I'm ready to go Alphonse-_sama_!" he said happily.

Al ruffled the boys hair, he was still a good 10 inches taller then the youngest sin. Wrath noticed Winry standing by the door with her jacket.

"Is she finally leaving? Sounds to good to be true!"

"Shove it you brat for your information Al-_chan _invited me to come get ice cream with you two so you better be nice to me!"

The black haired boy growled showing his sharp fangs at her, "You want to repeat yesterday?" she rolled her eyes "Please you cheated brat, attacking me before I could even put up a defense" Al sweat dropped rubbing the back of his golden bronze hair "Can we go?" they both snorted stomping out of the house and down the stairs to the sidewalk.

"To the park?"

"Yeah that's where the ice cream stand is"

"Lets hurry up so me and Al can go see Mrs. Hughes!" Winry said running down the sidewalk towards Central City Park. Al smiled a little jogging to keep up with her, Wrath glowered this was his only time to be alone with Alphonse and the stupid blonde girl had to ruin it. (A/N. Jealous much Wrath?)

They arrived at the park and Wrath ran directly to the stand, smiling widely at the selection of flavors.

"What will you have young miss?" the vendor asked tipping his hat to Wrath winking.

Wrath's face turned a dark blood red, he heard Winry giggle evilly at the vendor's mistake.

"I AM NOT A MISS!" now it was the ice cream man's time to blush.

"I am Sooooo sorry young man, it was a stupid mistake please forgive me! Um now what will you have?"

"I want the vanilla strawberry banana spilt" he grumbled.

The man nodded got the ice cream prepared, he still had a small blush to his cheeks he felt horrible for calling the boy a girl.

"Ok here ya go, its on the house"

"Thanks" Wrath said taking a bite of the sweet creamy treat.

"Anything for you sir?"

"Hmm a chocolate ice cream cone please"

"Coming right up"

Winry tapped her foot lightly, she was getting really annoyed. Not that she wasn't always annoyed.

"And do you want anything miss?

"No I'm good" she snapped.

The man flinched what had he done to disserve her nasty tone? Nothing she was just being a PMSing bitch like always, or at least that's what Wrath was thinking as he watched the exchange of words.

He rolled his eyes and then he threw his ice cream container away when he was finished. Al could feel the hostility coming from the blonde girl and the young sin, he should probably get Wrath home before they end up fighting in the middle of the park.

"HURRY UP YOU LITTLE BRAT!"

To late.

Wrath's eyes darkened to a scarlet purple and the irises shifted to resemble a cat's and his body started to grow larger showing off the muscles the boy's normal body doesn't have and his teeth grew as well.

"What did you say bitch?"

"YOU HEARED ME HURRY UP FAGGOT!"

"That's what I thought you said slut!"

The sin pounced on Winry slamming his fist into her face she grabbed her wrench from her purse and slammed it on top of his head. He just growled digging his fingers into her arms, ":HIT ME WITH THAT WRENCH AGAIN I DARE YA!" and of course being the stupid machine geek that she is she did it again. Wrath grabbed a hold of the blood soaked wrench from her grasp and tossed it at some random passer by and it hit with a loud clang. "MY FACE! WHO THE HELL THREW THAT WRENCH?" Al squeaked wrapping his arms around Wrath's waist failing to notice the bright blush on the sin's face and effortlessly lifted him off the blonde girl "COME ON BEFORE THAT GUY CALLS THE COPS!" Al shouted.

They all ran from the park just as soon as the police pulled up to the main gate. Alphonse set the black haired boy on his feet, sweating from running. Winry pouted "Al why did you carry **HIM **but not me?"

Now it was Al's turn to roll his bright golden eyes "Cause he is little you're not, and your legs are not broken last time I checked Winry" he muttered.

"Ugh! YOUR IMPOSSIBLE AL!"

"No I'm not impossible"

"ONLY IMPOSSIBLE PERSON HERE IS YOU SLUT!"

"OH YOU WANNA GO AGAIN YOU LITTLE PRICK!"

Al stared at them frowning as round 2 started.

Winry punched Wrath square in the jaw sending his small body gliding through the air, Al sighed and began to head back to the house. "HUH? WHERE ARE YOU GOING AL?" Winry shouted while dodging Wrath's fingernails. "Back to the house, away from you guys" he said waving back at them without turning around to see Winry and Wrath shaken looks.

"But Alphonse-_chan_!"

"Come on Al we promise we'll be good"

"No I've had it, you too just stay here and fight all day"

Winry whimpered running to catch up to him, she jumped on his back wrapping her arms around his neck. "Winry" he muttered dryly "Get off me, NOW!" she shook her head blonde tickling his cheek.

"No way, not till you stop and let us apologize"

"Yeah Alphonse, we swear we won't fight anymore"

Al shook his head and tried to pry Winry's arms from around his neck, he snarled when her arms refused to budge. "Winry!" still she refused to let go clinging to him like a fat girl to a drunk guy at last call. (A/N. I got that from the show World's Dumbest that's on truTV :D). He gave up standing still so that the blonde girl could climb off his back. "Seriously don't do that again Winry!" the girl nodded fiddling with the hem of her very short skirt.

"We're sorry Al"

"Yeah we're really sorry!"

"Alright I guess I can forgive you, but don't fight again or I am done playing referee with you two got it!"

The two both nodded their heads furiously so that they wouldn't anger the normally level headed Elric anymore. "Now come on Wrath, lets get you home before Envy-_san _or nii-san get worried" Alphonse said starting to walk again. The sin nodded and speeded up his pace to keep up the older boy with Winry trailing behind the pack.

"Which of you has the key?" Al asked when the got to the house and stood at the front door to find it locked. And they didn't think Ed was home, he had to go back to work, and Envy was probably asleep.

"I do" Wrath pulled his key from his pocket handing it to the bronze haired boy.

He unlocked the door, and stepped inside all the lights were out so that confirmed their suspicions of Ed leaving for work. Wrath went straight to his room, Al sat down on the couch picking up the book he had been reading before they left earlier. Winry decided to go check up on Envy since it was so quiet.

Don't get the wrong idea, she still dislikes him for stealing Ed's affections from her. But now she was more tolerant since Ed said she had to be nice or she would have to go.

She opened the door and found him awake slightly his head hanging over the side of the bed she noticed a trash can. And now that she thought about it, she could smell the foul stench coming from the waste basket. Winry plugged her nose inching closer to the bed, he looked up from the trash can with teary eyes and bits of vomit around his lips.

"Why are you in here?"

"Just came to check up on you, make sure you haven't vomited up you're intestines 'though that would be to much to hope for'" she muttered under her breath.

"GO AWAY!" he hissed eyes flashing between purple to a crimson red.

"Whatever sorry for trying to be nice!" she snapped and slammed the door shut.

Winry kicked the door with her boot sticking her nose up in the air and trudging back down the stairs, her feet almost touched the floor till she heard soft talk coming from the living room. 'Al and Wrath' she figured, she inched closer and pressed her ear to the wall.

"So Wrath-_chan_ are you sure you want to learn alchemy? It pretty hard, especially if you have Izumi-sensei as a teacher"

They were discussing the sin learning alchemy, he was the only homunculi for some odd reason who could perform the dangerous science.

"Yeah I'm sure"

'Yeah you're real sure you little queer!' she snapped in her head.

"Alright, we will start with the most basic alchemy ok"

"Ok"

'He and Ed never showed me how to do alchemy'

(A/N. That's because you're a gearhead Winry)

She could here the familier ping like sound as Al performed his form of alchemy, he had talked about becoming a State Alchemist himself. '

But footsteps to from behind her made her jump, she turned around to see Envy dressed in a plain white t-shirt and shorts his hair was tied in a braid, he glowered at her. "Why did you really come in our room for? You really couldn't of done it just to check on me" she rolled her eyes "Yes I did I still want to be on Ed's goodside if you two break up, then there will be room for me to take you're place" she said evilly.

Envy glared.

"Yeah you keep dreaming blondie"

"Did I hurt someone's pride?"

"Please don't flatter you're self it will take more then that to deal any damage to me"

And he walked off to the kitchen flipping the blonde off as he went.

The talking in the living room had stopped after Envy left, she looked around the doorframe to see Wrath sleeping on Al's chest. 'WTH!' she screamed in her head, she stomped into the room waking the two up.

"And why the hell are you sleeping on him?"

"Winry he was tired so he fell asleep on me it's no big deal"

"It is to me"

"Everythings a big deal to you" Wrath muttered dryly.

"Keep muttering shrimp, I have a spare wrench upstairs in my tool chest!"

"Bring it!"

"WRATH, WINRY WHAT DID I SAY EALIER ABOUT ARGUING?"

They all heard a loud crash behind them coming from the kitchen. And they all broke into a run to see what was going on, they found Envy reaching for a box of cereal. They looked down to see broken glass below the older sin's feet, oh Ed was gonna be pissed if he saw the mess.

"Envy-_san_ why didn't you call us if you were hungry so that you wouldn't of cause such a mess! Nii-san is going to be angry!"

"He'll get over it"

"So rude"

"Bitch keep talking you may of promised the chibi, but I didn't promise him anything I will kill you!"

"Yeah and I will help Envy-nii-san"

Al groaned pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation. But the sound of the front door opening and closing broke them all out of they're discussion. Ed was taking off his red jacket hanging on the coat rack, and walked into the kitchen.

"Hey guys whats-" but he stopped mid sentence seeing the shards of glass and his golden eyes bugled and his face turned red, steam could be seen coming out of his ears.

"WHAT THE FUCK WHO DID THAT?"

"Winry" Wrath lied pointing an ominous finger at said blonde.

"No I didn't Wrath did it!"

"WOULD YOU TWO STOP BICKERING DAMMIT!" Envy snarled rubbing his temples.

And for once the two did shut up, Envy dangerous mood swing was enough to make them almost piss themselves. Al snickered quietly, "Wow he made them shut up for the first time in hours" Ed still was pissed cracking his knuckles in a threatening matter.

"SPILL WHO DID IT OR EVERYONE'S GONNA GET A KNUCKLE SANDWHICH UPSIDE THE HEAD!"

"It was Envy!" Winry squawked.

Envy sent daggers who way. "What a kiss ass" he snapped crossing his arms over his chest.

"Like you're one to talk!"

"Yeah I like to kiss ass chibi's ass, and I enjoy it every time when he shoves hi-"

"BAH BAH ENOUGH OF THAT I LIKED TO HAVE MY EARS REMAIN VIRGINS FOR A LITTLE WHILE LONGER!" Al shouted plugging his ears with his fingers shaking his head back in forth in a comical manner.

"You're horrible!"

"Yeah chibi said that too, because I wouldn't let him-"

"Envy!"

"Wha just telling her like it is"

"Yeah but you got my kid brother and you're kid brother here don't talk dirty like that save it for the bedroom" Ed murmured.

"And anyways Envy you're so gonna clean that up!"

"Awwww but chibi I'm tired"

"You weren't to tired when you flipped me off after I had so kindly mind you asked if you were okay!" Winry hissed.

"You weren't checking up on me to see if I was ok, you were checking to see I was dead yet! I heard you cold heartless wench!"

"RUNNING OUT OF INSULTS?"

"ARE YOU?"

Ed banged his head against the counter top, Al and Wrath both stared dryly at the argument between the two. This was probably gonna go on all day, Al walked out of the kitchen and into the living room and read his book again, Wrath went back to his room slamming the door shut. And poor Edo stayed in the kitchen to make sure the dispute wouldn't turn into a brawl since Envy wasn't exactly in the best condition to be fight anyone.

"FUCK YOU!

"NO THANKS I LIKE COCK NOT PUSSY! NO WAIT SCRATCH THAT I LIKE A REAL MAN NOT A GUY WHO GOT A SEX CHANGE!"

"EEEEKKKK YOU'RE SUCH AN EVIL BASTARD!

"YOU JUST NOW FIGURING THAT OUT?

"BITCH!"

"SLUT!"

"PRICK!"

"CUNT!"

"WHORE!"

"YOU DAUGHTER OF A DICK!" (A/N. I had to add that for my friend Melanie who came up with that because we've always heard son of a bitch that for a guy so what do you call a girl? A daughter of a dick XD)

Winry screeched loudly and aimed to punch Envy but Ed's hand caught her fist mid air, "Winry what did I say?" she squeaked "I'm sorry Ed" he rolled his eyes "Just pack you're stuff and head back to Resembool" he muttered she hung her head and walked dejectedly up the stairs and into the guest room. He would let her stay one more night then she had to be gone by the time Ed took Envy to his doctor's appointment.

Ed looked at Envy "You still sick?" the sin shook his head "No but I probably will be in the morning like always" he said. The blonde sighed taking Envy's hand and they walked up the stairs together.

"Wrath don't you stay up half the night you hear me!" Envy shouted over his shoulder.

"Yeah I hear ya nii-san"

"You too Al" Ed said loudly knowing his brother heard him.

"Yes brother"

They walked into their room, Envy laid down while Ed got dressed for bed. Ed slept in just his shorts, the sin had rolled over on to his side. He felt the blonde's arms slide around his waist, he smirked.

"Chibi not tonight"

"Who was suggesting anything"

"Ooh my mistake guess you don't want any sex"

"Shove it Envy, you're sick right now I don't want you tired out even more then you already are"

Envy rolled his purple eyes, but nodded while yawning. He let his eyes slip close, shifting just slightly to get into a comfortable position. Ed kissed his forehead and began to drift off himself. "Sweet dreams koi" he whispered (A/N. Aww fluff :D) eyes shutting out the world welcoming the dreams of peace.

There ya go chapter 3 XD

The chapter name is suggesting a kissy kissy between Wrath and Al but I'm not get them into the whole swing until maybe chapter 4 or 5 depends because well I couldn't find away to incorpurate the kiss into this chapter since Al was mad at Wrath for a while because of him and Winry going at each others throats though you can tell Wrath likes Al, it wouldn't become painfully obvious to our little soul alchemist till after he gets with oh nvm no spoilers XD

Lot of vulgar language lol and dirty talk from our sexy palm tree XD

And I am going commerate all my reviewers who enjoy this story J

_**BurningWhiteTwilight: Thank you so much, you're support of this story is much appreciated**_

_**Jrlock: Thanks a lot for liking it hope you like this chapter as well, and I might update my other stories soon but I'm not sure when.**_

_**BeyondBirthday'slover: Yes thanks for liking it and encouraging me to continue writing this fic, and yeah after I went back and looked at the story myself I noticed the minor grammar mistakes that I will fix as soon as I am able or feel like it actually.**_


	4. Envy is WHAT!

Chapter 4 Envy is WHAT?

Alright chapter 4 I am really happy that everyone is liking this story so far, that makes me so happy *cries tears of joy* sorry for not updating right away I'm been getting a little side tracked with playing the new Assassin's Creed Brotherhood! I already beat it lol but I keep replaying missions seeing if I missed anything XD

And to answer my faithful reader BurningWhiteTwilight's question of if Winry's really given up so easily I don't know you just have to keep reading to find out J

Anyways disclaimer

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN ENVY HAHAHA NO NOT REALLY BUT IF I DID YOU WOULD SEE A LOT MORE YAOI GOING ON IN THE SERIES :D**

Ch 4 Envy is WHAT?

The next morning, Ed heard the familier rustling of the bed sheets as Envy made his way to the bathroom and the loud slamming of said door. He grunted rising out of bed scratching the back of his head, yawning and walked to the bathroom. The blonde knelled down beside the pale, heaving, figure and pulled the long green hair out of his lover's ashen face.

"Ed, I don't think I can make it to the doctor's" Envy moaned around the dry heaves that shook his frame.

"Come on, just take a quick shower then maybe you'll feel a little better" the blonde tried to reason.

Envy just continued to dry heave, not stopping till his stomach deemed it's self empty. Ed released the sin's hair and turned the shower on for the homunculus. "I'm gonna go make breakfast, don't leave the door open so that you don't have to smell the food okay?" Envy nodded as his boyfriend strode out of the bathroom shutting the door behind him as he went.

Ed walked down stairs into the kitchen, Winry was already downstairs with her bags bunched up by the door. He nodded in her direction, he didn't want to be mean but she had to let him go and move on or she would never find true happiness.

"You want to eat before you head to the train station?"

"Um sure, thank you" she mumbled.

He got to work, grabbing a pan from the cupboard he set it on the stove turning the appliance on to high. Winry watched him with love sick eyes, wishing oh so desperately that she was in Envy's place.

The blonde boy put bacon and eggs into the pan and watched the meat sizzle under the heat. He heard the loud footsteps of Wrath walking towards the kitchen, he turned from the stove and smiled at the youngest sin.

"Wrath watcha want for breakfast before you go to school?"

"Aww Ed-_**san**_ do I really have to go to school today! I want to go with you and nii-san to the doctor's!"

"Yeah you have to or Envy will have my neck"

"Nii-san is so stiff!" Wrath whined cutely totally ignoring the blonde girl sitting next to him.

"You take it up with him you've missed school two days in a row, and he'll be pissed if you missed another just because of him so I wouldn't waste my breath in asking"

"Edo I can watch and make sure he doesn't skip school!" Winry said batting her eyelashes at the blonde chibi. Wrath gaped like a fish out of water but then he found his voice again.

"HER WATCH ME OH HELL NO!"

"Well I don't know Winry…"

"Come on give me a chance to make it up to you for yesterday and not keeping my promise!" she begged.

"Yeah alright"

"Thank you Ed, you won't regret this!"

"Yeah somehow I doubt that, but whatever just make sure he gets on the bus matter of fact it should be here in about another 15 minutes"

"Well isn't Envy's appointment at 8:30?"

"Uh huh, so as soon as he gets down here we're gonna leave"

And if by the mere mentioning of his name, the green haired palm tree graced the household with his presence. He word a blue t-shirt over a black tank top with faded blue jeans. "Can we go chibi" Ed nodded walking towards the front door grabbing his red jacket and Envy black leather coat.

"Wrath behave for her please!"

"I will" he lied crossing his finger behind his back.

Ed hailed a taxi for them, and when the driver pulled over them, they piled into the cab. Then they were down the street and out of sight. Winry gave Wrath a small smile trying to act friendly so that the boy wouldn't blab on her as soon as Ed and Envy came home.

"So did you want to eat before you go to school?"

"No not if you're the cook! You probably would poison me"

"No what would I gain from doing that?"

"Oh I don't know… Maybe Ed's attention because he will think I had died on accident and will comfort you!"

"That's ridiculous!"

"OH IS IT?"

"Yes it is and stop yelling I think Alphonse is still asleep"

They both froze when the heard the shuffling of bare feet on the cold wooden floor, Al walked in yawing and rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "A little late for that" he said huskily sleep still weighed his voice down, Winry giggled half heartedly "We're sorry Al" she said.

"No problem I had to get up soon anyways, hey where's nii-san?"

"He left to take Envy to the doctors"

"Awww man I was going to go with him, but I slept in" he said sadly while smacking his palm to his forehead. "Al it isn't the end of the world calm down" Wrath said walking over to the older boy and punching his arm lightly.

"Yeah you're right, I can just catch up later, ooh what smells so good in here?"

"Ed had cooked eggs and bacon before he left"

"Yummy!" he said jumping over to the stove and putting some of the scrumptious food on to his plate.

Wrath sat down and gobbled his own meal down quickly, then they all heard the loud honk of the school bus pulling up to the house. Winry flashed the black haired boy a warning look and he got to his feet.

"You know I still owe you a beating for yesterday!"

"Oh would you get over it!"

"No"

"Well guess what you're gonna have to because you need to get on that bus"

"Wrath go get on the bus" Al said without looking up from his food. Wrath giggled a little before grabbing his book bag off the floor and ran out of the house towards the bus. Winry harrumphed crossing her arms over her ample chest, "Why does he always listen to you?" Al shrugged "I don't know but it's cool to have somebody who actually listens to me" he said rolling his eyes upward to look at her.

"Al…" she warned eyes narrowing he smirked.

"Nee I'm just kidding Winry"

"Sure you were"

"Anyway changing the subject, what did you wanna do today you know before you have to go back home?"

"I just wanted to go see Mrs. Hughes before I left, but wait Al aren't you coming to?"

"Well…. I don't know I was thinking about just staying here and living with nii-san you know since Envy is sick and all brother needs all the help he can get with the house"

"But Al…"

Alphonse was torn stay here and have a stressful life with Ed and the homunculi or go back home with Winry and have the quiet life he and Ed had strided so hard to achieve ever since they had regained their bodies back.

"Yeah I'll pack my things, but can we wait till nii-san comes home so he can see us off?"

She nodded smiling happily that she was gonna have at least one of the Elric's by her side.

0o0o0 _With Ed and Envy at the doctor's._

Ed got out of the cab first, wiping the sweat from his brow it had gotten hot out for no reason at all. He looked over at Envy who was sweating just as bad as he was, "You ok do you want something to drink?" he asked taking the sin's hand in his own.

"No it's hot as hell chibi and yeah I'm thirsty" he mumbled.

"Ok well let's get inside they're bound to have a fan running"

They walked into the lounge, Janette the secretary was once again reading a magazine while she twiddled her manicured fingernails through her hair. He glared he really didn't feel like dealing with the air headed woman at the moment especially since his boyfriend's results were just beyond the door beside her desk.

"Hey I have an 8:30 appointment for Envy Elric to see Dr. Hamilton"

Janette looked up from the magazine with annoyed look herself, "Ok just wait Dr. Hamilton is busy seeing Mrs. Noah who is pregnant at the moment I think someone who is expecting is a little more important then somebody with the stomach flu!" (A/N. bitch isn't she XP) Ed narrowed his golden eyes at the blonde haired woman.

"You don't know what the hell is wrong with him lady so fuck you!" he snarled.

"Oh just shut up kid and go sit down till I call you!"

He grumbled all the way back to where Envy was sitting, the sin looked worn and out of it. But the green haired homunculi could still muster the strength to glare at Janette. The doors opened and they both saw a woman who was heavily pregnant maybe 7½ months along walking with her husband out of the office..

"Elric!" Janette hissed from her position behind the desk.

They got up and walked through the doors and entered the room Janette had pointed at. Zita was writing the last bit of notes from the previous appointment, instead of her usual attire the brunette was dressed in a lose jean skirt and a white t-shirt. She turned around from her work and she froze upon seeing them. Zita opened her file drawer pulling out the file with Envy's name written on it.

"Hey doc what's got you so worked up? Ed asked trying to keep the worry out of his voice.

"Oh nothing, would you two please have a seat" she said pointing to the two stools by the examination table.

"Ok is he alright?"

"Oh he's fine, his test_s _all came back negative and we even ran a test to see if it could be cancer"

"What about the cancer test?"

"Clean"

Ed let a wave of relief wash over him upon hearing the words he had been dying to hear for two days.

"However…." Zita continued looking at them over her glasses.

"However what?"

"There was one test that came back with a strange blood cell in it"

"WHAT WHAT WAS IT?"

"Mr. Elric please lower you're voice, nothing is wrong with Envy"

"BUT YOU JUST SAID-!"

"Mr. Elric I will not tell you again calm down young man it's nothing serious!"

"Ok I'm sorry just please tell us"

"It was a pregnancy test"

Envy who had been quiet the whole time, eyes bugled from they're sockets and he gagged.

"Pre-pre-pregnancy?"

"Yes pregnancy, it was an accident one of our technicians had mistakenly put you're results on a pregnancy test sheet but by the time we had discovered the error it was to late, when the results came out the test marked an increased rate of hormones and you're blood pressure had spiked":

Ed was glaring at the friendly woman with pure dislike she had to be lying.

"Yeah but he's 17 shouldn't that be normal for his hormones to be high?" he asked trying to bring some logic to the table for the high hormone level.

"Yes we thought that was the possibility, but when we looked a little further we discovered hcG in his blood and that is not something you usually find in a male body"

"But!"

"I know it 's hard to understand, but what is clear is that you are pregnant Envy"

Envy stared at her for a minute before he just hiccupped and ran from the room holding his stomach with one hand and covering his mouth with the other. Ed was dazed, "He's really pregnant you're not lying?"

Zita shook her head.

"No I'm not, hcG is a hormone you only find in pregnant woman or in this case boy, didn't you find it a little strange that he was throwing up but not showing any other signs of the flu?"

He nodded. "Yeah but what really took the cake was when I caught him eating raw meat!"

"Raw meat? Ok that's not normal even for someone who is pregnant!" she sounded horrified not that the blonde boy could blame her, it had sickened him as well.

"What would make him crave that?"

"Um well unless he was carrying an animal nothing!"

Ed blanched himself, remembering 2 years ago when he, Ling that lazy ass prince or should he say emperor now and Envy had been swallowed by Gluttony and had been trapped in the grubby sin's stomach for a whole day.

He recalled punching his boyfriend angering him so badly that the sin had released his true form upon the blonde and Ling. He had been a giant monstrous dragon with two different colored eyes one purple the other a pinkish red kinda like the color of the Philosopher's stone, that form could very well be influenced on the b-b-ab-y he was still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that the sin was pregnant with his child who was probably going to take after it's 'mother' in more ways then one.

"Well anyways I did the liberty of judging how far along Envy is and I would say about 2½ months so you'll have a little you running around at home in a good 7 months" Zita said smiling a little.

"You won't tell anyone?"

"No, no, no, no, no of course not! I'm not a traitor I am only out for the safety of my patients so don't worry you're secret is safe with me"

He smiled knowing he could trust her, but he thought she probably was going to crack because all of this craziness the blonde and homunculus had brought upon her.

Envy had walked back into the office room crying. WAIT CRYING? ENVY NEVER CRIED NEVER NOT EVEN WHEN HE HAD BEEN ALMOST BURNED ALIVE BY ROY!. "Ed… *sob*" he whimpered Ed flinched as he felt Envy lay on top of him crying into his shirt in front of Zita.

"En-en-vy!"

"I'M PREGNANT!" he wailed.

"Yes I am aware of that Envy!"

"You aren't mad?"

"No why would I be mad!"

"OH WELL I DON'T KNOW MAYBE THE FACT BEING IS I'M A MALE WHO IS KNOCKED UP WITH YOU'RE KID!" Ed winced and tried to get his boyfriend off of him for the safety of his own skin.

"Ed don't worry just mood swings he'll have them off and on till the end of the pregnancy" Zita explained. "What about the vomiting?" Envy asked looking from his boyfriend to the woman with hopeful eyes, hoping she would tell him the morning sickness would go away soon.

"It usually clears up by the second trimester, but some women or in you're case men may have it the entire pregnancy"

He paled considerably and almost fainted on the spot but his pride wouldn't let him. "But haven't you been taking that medication I prescribed you to help ease the nausea?" Zita asked he nodded "Yeah but it doesn't do a whole lot when I can't keep the pill down!" she blinked "You've even been throwing up the pills?" he nodded again. She scratched her chin thoughtfully "Well is there anything you else you can take?" Envy was about open his mouth and mention the stones but Ed gave him a look and he shut his trap.

"Envy I would like you to come visit me again in about another month when you're about to begin you're second trimester alright. And please try to eat healthy, because from what Ed tells me you've been eating um interesting meals as of late which are a bit special even for someone who is pregnant"

"You mean the meat?"

She nodded "Yes the raw meat, yes babies do need iron but there is a problem that meat was uncooked there for, there was no good nutritional value in the blood. You have to eat vegetables, fruit and grain at best which from my understanding you liked pre-pregnancy so just get used to consuming it again or the baby may develop defects or other health issues if it doesn't get the proper nutrition understand?"

Envy pouted a little, yes he wanted the baby to be healthy but uncooked meat and the incomplete Philosopher's stones was all the developing fetus wanted. He couldn't stomach veggies like he used to, any time his boyfriend was eating vegetable soup he would get nauseous and quickly leave the kitchen for the safety of the hall away from the stench.

"Don't pout now, just try to consume some veggies ok? You can do that for me right?"

"Yeah" he said getting to his feet.

"Ok doc does he need any medication?"

"No but he probably does need to take some parental vitamins since I am fairly sure his body can't produce the hormones that those contain naturally"

"Alright thanks Dr. Hamilton"

They walked back out of the office nervous as a virgin on prom night, Envy kept making quick rubs at his belly still trying to grasp the fact that he was pregnant. Ed was quiet trying to figure how this could of happened, he looked over at his lover "Envy how did this happen?" the sin glared.

"How the hell am I supposed to know!"

"Well it is you're body!"

"So that doesn't mean I know how I got a womb! But you're one who shoved his co-!" but Ed slammed a palm over the green haired homunculus' mouth when he noticed the people in the waiting room were staring at them like they were crazy. Mothers who could imagine what the sin was going to say placed their hands over their children's ears and glaring at him in disapproval.

"We'll continue this at home" he mumbled removing his hand. Envy nodded and they quickly walked out of the clinic and hailed a taxi (A/N, Ed seriously invest in a car XD) . The driver dropped them off and they both sprinted into the house slamming the door shut locking it.

"nii-san?"

Ed and Envy turned around to see Alphonse with his suitcase in hand and Winry at his side, she had her arm linked with his. The older brother did a double take when did they get so friendly? Yesterday they were about to hate each other now they were holding hands? It confused him but he would ask his younger brother later.

"Hey Al, Winry"

"We're heading home today but Al wanted to see you off"

"Oh" Ed said sounding disappointed

"Yeah but we'll come to visit whenever we can promise brother" Al said smiling.

"Anyways how'd the doctor's appointment go?" Winry asked locking eyes on Envy who was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his lower stomach as if trying to conceal something that wouldn't become obvious for another couple months.

"Oh it went alright" Ed chuckled nervously he was afraid of her reaction he didn't know why it bothered him he didn't like her, maybe he was just afraid of his, Envy and the baby's health.

"Good I'm glad you're alright Envy" she lied right through her teeth she still hoped he would contract some disease and die of it later on so that she could have her short blonde knight in shining armor.

"Yeah"

"So what was wrong with you? And did Ms. Hamilton give you anything for the nausea?"

The two lovers exchanged looks of uncertainty should they tell the others or not?

"Um chibi you handle that one"

"Why me?"

"Because I don wanna!"

"And what makes you think I want to do it?"

"Just do it Ed please!"

"Ok fine!"

The blonde breathed deeply through his nose, looking up his eyes bright. He opened his mouth and spoke the unspeakable words that would rock a certain blonde girl's core.

"Envy's pregnant"

"Gah?"

"Huh?

Both Al and Winry made funny noises of distress, the lovers watched them waiting for the two to regain their composure. Then Winry broke into laughter her eyes maddened while she laughed loudly though it slowly turned into a chuckle then died.

"YOU'RE JOKING RIGHT?"

"No"

"Not by a long shot"

"Bu-b-but you have to by kidding there's no **possible** way for Envy to be knocked up!"

"H-h-h-how?" Al stammered.

"How do you think Al!" the boy blushed twiddling his pointer fingers together, then he shook his head. "I know how brother! But I mean Envy-_san _I thought you we're a man?".

"I _**STILL **_am! Just happen to have a soon to be 10 to 8 ½ pound beach ball growing inside me"

"Winry you ok?" the question was directed at the blonde girl who was swaying lightly on her feet, she was dazed. Then without warning the drama queen's eyes rolled back into her skull and she fell backwards landing with a loud thud.

"A?"

"Al pick her up and take her to the living room"

"Ok nii-san" he lifted the light girl off the wooden floor and laid her down on the couch, brushing her pale blonde locks out of her face. Envy watched her with half lidded eyes, he didn't feel sorry for her in the least. Al placed a hand on her cheek and the baby blues fluttered open for a few seconds then closed again, then when she opened them again she kept them open.

"Al I think you guys should get going" Ed said.

"Ok if you think that's what's best nii-san, come on Winry we're leaving"

"Thank God!" she cried launching herself off the couch grabbing her bags and running out the front door laughing maniacally. Al sweat dropped in fear and grabbed his suit case up from it had been discarded in the hallway. And with a small wave he disappeared with Winry down the street towards the train station, then once it was quiet Ed looked at Envy with confusion.

"Envy I still want to figure out how you got pregnant"

"I know chibi, its eating at me too but there's nothing we can do right now, all we can do is wait till the baby gets here"

"Do you think, it was I don't know you're true form's influence?"

"Maybe since that form is technically female"

Ed gaped at his boyfriend. "BUT WE NEVER HAD SEX WHILE YOU WE'RE IN THAT FORM!"

"Yeah I am aware of that but maybe it changed , well maybe it changed my innards around?"

"Maybe I guess that kinda makes sense"

Later on the couple heard the familier honk of the Central City school bus, they were upstairs when they heard Wrath opening the front door and slamming it shut. Ed got up from his position on their bed and clambered downstairs he smiled at the black haired boy.

"How was school Wrath?" the boy smiled back.

"It was good"

"Cool you and that Carmen girl kiss yet?"

Wrath glared.

"Ed you know I don't like my friend like that! And besides I'm gay! You know that!"

"Yeah I know I was just joking" he said laughing.

They heard footsteps on the landing and they turned around to see Envy, leaning against the banister a hand on his lower stomach rubbing small circles while he smirked. Wrath blinked in confusion "Nii-san?" the older sin just smirked even more "How did school go Wrathy?" the younger brother rolled his dark blue eyes in mock irritation.

"It was ok big brother, but more importantly how did the doctor's appointment go?"

"It went just fine"

"Oh ok so what was wrong?"

Envy just smirked again, and his eyes rolled downward towards his belly where his hand was still rubbing gentle circles. "Envy, do you want me to tell him or are you going to?" Ed asked smiling at the sight of the sin already beginning to love their unborn child.

"I'll handle it Hagane'O chibi-san"

"Handle what?" Wrath question getting suspicious, what were they not telling him yet?

"Wrath you know how I was vomiting well still vomiting"

The sin nodded. "It's only natural for me to be sick, I have it hopefully only during the first three months"

Wrath was so confused what the hell was Envy talking about? Vomiting is not normal, ok if you have the stomach flu or virus, but those usually only lasted a couple weeks or a month at least but Envy was doing it for almost 2 months going on 3.

"Natural? Did those pills that doctor give you fry you're brain cells brother?"

"No I'm serious Wrath its normal for someone expecting"

"Expecting what?"

"Envy stop teasing him, just tell him before he explodes" Ed mumbled leaning against the wall away from the red faced and petrified Wrath. The blonde wasn't to keen on wearing pieces of homunculi on his clothes.

"Expecting WHAT? BROTHER TELL ME!"

"…"

"NII-SAN!"

Finally after the further corner's of Envy's mouth were hitched up into a painful smile the sin's lips moved to form the most unlikely words Wrath had expected his brother to say.

"You're gonna be an uncle"

"Huh?"

"You heard me ira-_chan_"

"But oh you mean you and Ed-_san _are gonna adopt"

"No…"

"….?"

"I mean I'm gonna have a baby"

"Yeah one you guys adopt right? Because there is no way that nii-san could be pregnant right? Right?"

The two older males remained silent,

"RIGHT? PLEASE TELL ME I'M RIGHT!"

"Nope sorry, ira-_chan _but I'm pregnant, no joking I'm 2½ months pregnant"

Ed plugged his ears waiting for the scream, laughing or gurgling.

Wrath made a hiccupping sound and then his eyes, which had faded to a dull, mockery or the original navy blue rolled into the back of his skull and he fainted.

Ed crouched down cupping the pale boy's clammy cheek, "Envy why did you have to go and do that!" the older sin rolled his own eyes "Because there was no other way to break it to him that his brother is pregnant chibi-san!" the blonde sighed lifting the small raven off the floor and on to his shoulder caring upstairs to the guest room.

"Well I think he can sleep in here, till we decide what color to paint the walls for the baby"

"Yeah I guess"

"You guess? Come on Envy, we've got 7½ months to plan for this baby!

"I'm aware of that chibi!"

"Then act like it!" That was probably not the smartest thing to snap at the now delicate sin, because just as soon as the fiery words left the blonde boys mouth then no sooner did Envy's violet orbs start to glisten with fresh tears. 'Ah shit' Ed regretted snapping at his boyfriend who was clearly not able to control his own emotions.

"I-I-I-m t-r-r-y-ing y-y-you st-u-u-pid c-h-h-bi BASTARD!"

"Don't cry Envy! It okay I didn't mean to snap at you!"

"SHUT UP BASTARD JUST SHUT UP!"

"En-en-vy!"

Ed gripped the snarling sin's shoulder and kissed him hard!

"Enough Envy ok I'm sorry I shouldn't of snapped at you when I know you're hormones are on the fritzs"

Envy just glared at his boyfriend and punched him in the cheek.

"There you're forgiven, now you get a prize" the sin kissed the blonde's bruised cheek then his perfect lips. Wrath groaned quietly sitting up rubbing his aching head, he looked over the bedpost to see his brother close to having a mad make out session with Edward on the floor.

"Uh..?"

The two lovers looked up from kissing to see the blushing Wrath on the bed, "Oh sorry Wrath!" Ed apologized climbing out from under the older sin who pouted slightly but still got to his feet.

Wrath wobbled to his feet, he was starting to recognize where he was "Where the bitch?" he asked the blonde blinked "Oh you mean Winry?" when the sin nodded he continued "She went back home, Al went with her, I think their dating now".

"What?"

"Their dating I think"

"No, no, no, no, no! WHY WOULD HE DATE HER?" Wrath wailed gripping his wild black locks.

"Wrath what is the problem? I am happy if my brother likes somebody! Even if that somebody is a bit to be nice is a psycho gearhead!"

"OH REALLY YOU CAN'T TELL?"

"Can't tell what!"

"…"

Then it struck him like a ton of bricks, Wrath was in love with Al!

Ed gave the young sin a small smile "You like him don't you" the boy blushed rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah I do a lot but now that bitch has him" he whimpered the blonde rolled his golden eyes "Eh I think Al will get over his little crush on Winry if you give him time but it can wait Al and Winry will be back up here in a couple of months".

"Ok Ed-_san_" the boy said happily awaiting the arrival of his crush in a couple of months.

Envy was sitting on the edge of the bed doubled over sweating, Ed looked over at him confused "Envy?" he asked running to his side.

"Just morning sickness or more like afternoon sickness" he groaned rubbing his belly "Nothing new Edo" the blonde sighed brushing the long brackish mane out of his boyfriend's face. Then he got an idea he unwrapped the sin's arms from around his stomach and placed his face to the sin's navel.

"Hey stop given you're _mom _a hard time Jr. or no meat" he joked.

Envy stared down at the golden hair that was pressed to his belly and stared at him like he was crazy like the baby which probably could be no bigger then a hotdog hear him? But just as soon as the nausea had come the sooner it was gone just like that, he blinked "Huh? How did you do that?".\

"Just gave him an offer he couldn't refuse" he smirked cheekily the sin rolled his eyes smiling a little.

"Woah" Wrath was amazed for some odd reason or another.

"I'm tired chibi put me to bed"

"Has you wish you're highness" he said lifting the pregnant boy off the bed and walked towards their room he called over his shoulder "Wrath you can sleep in here tonight till we turn into the nursery alright" Wrath nodded "Ok" and then they closed the door behind them.

They got in the bedroom shutting the door, he laid Envy down on the sheets. Ed climbed on top of his lover a smile plastered on his lips, he kissed the perfect pale lips, then his hand traveled down the sin's leg. Envy blushed, "Ed don't I think we should ask the doc if its okay to do **that **again" he said grabbing the blonde boy's wondering hand and placed it on his belly where there was a small swell.

"Yeah you're right, at least till she gives us the ok"

The sin kissed him and then got comfortable falling asleep, Ed smiled wrapping his arms around his boy friend making sure that his hands landed on the stomach housing the future expansion of his family. He drifted off the outcome this ordeal still fresh in his mind.

Ok there ya go ch 4 this chapter is pretty long to make up for the long wait once again distracted by the greatness that is Assassin Creed :D ok the second greatness only FMA takes the top prize on my list.

And if anybody is wondering about the nickname Envy gives to Wrath _Ira-chan_ it's the Latin name for Wrath if my source is correct which I'm pretty sure it is I got it off Wikipedia.

I apologize to the readers for making you guys wait so long I should of posted this the moment I got back on my computer but…. Never mind anyways this chapter is longer then all of them combined you guys will get 5 more chapters maybe more I don't know only if you guys keep reading and reviewing.

Sorry if this chapter pisses anyone off that Winry gets a hold of Al, but don't worry she is not keeping him ok he is soooooooooooooooo going to be with Wrath there will be an all claws out cat fight :D in ch 7 you will get your cat fight after Wrath gets a little 'close' to Alphonse-_chan_ :) but that is all you get ok no more then that :D spoilers are a no no XD byes


	5. WrathAlLove

**The Unexpected Ch 5 :D**

**Wow this story is getting so long but I cant stop writing!**

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN A PICTURE OF ED AS PRIDE DOES THAT COUNT? NO? OH WELL WORTH A SHOT...**

* * *

Ch 5 Wrath+Al=Love

A month later Envy once again found himself sitting in Dr. Zita's office, his t-shirt rolled up to show off the growing curve of his belly. Ed was sitting on one of the stools besides him, their hands entwined Zita smiled while pulling on a pair of latex gloves.

"So it seems you gained a bit of weight since the last time I saw you" she giggled taking the other stool and sat beside him.

"Um is that normal? I mean I heard that you usually don't start showing till you're at least 4 months along" he murmured.

"Well….. Depends the baby could be just a big boy or girl or…." she drawled rubbing the back of her head sheepishly he blinked "Or what?" Zita just remained silent.,

"You could be carrying multiples"

"Gah?"

"You can't be serious?" Ed squeaked.

"I am very serious but we won't know till Envy gives birth"

"Why can't you tell now?"

"I guess we can try to find out now" she said getting to her feet placing her gloved palms onto the sin's belly pressing in just a bit, never quiet doing it so hard that she caused him any discomfort. Her huge brown eyes widen "Um Mr. Elric" he looked up "No way!" and he fainted.

"Soooo h-h-h-ow ma-m-many?" Envy groaned quietly pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Twins"

"Thank God, its only two of them" he released a sigh of relief rubbing his stomach, she nodded crouching down and lifting the knocked out blonde off the floor and sat him on the small loveseat in the office. "So what are the risks? I know there as got to be some catch when it come to more then one baby" Envy said sitting up a little to look her in the eyes.

"Wow you know more then I gave you credit for" she said sounding surprised.

He rolled his eyes "Mah I did my research you know its not everyday a guy gets pregnant"

"True" Zita smiled "Well the biggest risk is premature birth"

"Premature birth?"

"Yes it means the baby is born before its ready, there is only so much room you're body as small as it is can provide, and multiples take up even more space so there is no more room for them to grow so they are smaller then most infants and they can develop birth defects quiet easily, the longest a woman held multiples was 7 months but she was carrying triplets"

"Did she make it?"

"Oh yes the mother was fine, but the babies however.."

He nodded for her to continue "One of the babies died, it had developed yellow fever two days after it's birth, a boy I believe that was a good 175 years ago, it was a little odd though the baby had been fine when it was born and the doctor's had monitored them all night long made sure nothing had occurred but after the mother had visited that's when the child developed the fever I am not speculating anything but it still was a bit strange"

Envy was shocked a little, and he prayed that wouldn't happen to their children.

"Oh but don't worry you have me I wont let anything happen to you're babies"

"Yeah I believe you"

"Anyways do you have anymore questions?"

"Well one, how am I supposed to give birth?"

"Oh we will have to perform a C-section, since you *giggle* lack certain parts"

He rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah I know but what is a C-section?"

"It's where we make an incision here" she said pointing at the base of his belly and drawing a horizontal line across it "To here, it's a very basic procedure and you'll be numbed so you won't feel anything but be aware complications can occur" she informed him.

"Alright doc thanks" he said getting to his feet, the sin rubbed Ed's shoulder gently at first till the blonde refused to budge "CHIBI GET UP!" he growled that woke alchemist up right away in fear of being hit. Envy maybe pregnant and his motor skills were getting sluggish but that didn't mean his punches didn't hurt.

The two thanked Zita again and walked out of the clinic, Ed had finally purchased a car so they wouldn't have to pay for a taxi again. On the way home Envy leaned back in the seat rubbing his belly fondly, Ed smirked and dared a pat at the pale,., rounded flesh, this earned him a growl from the sin who wasn't very comfortable with other people except Zita rubbing his belly only because she had to, to make sure the baby no scratch that babies were alright.

"Come on, their my kids to"

"I'm aware of that chibi-baka but I don't like the tummy rubs!"

"You let Zita do it!"

"Well she has to, make sure the twins are ok you just to do it to annoy me" he joked sticking his tongue out. Ed rolled his golden eyes, they pulled up to the front of the townhouse it was Friday and Wrath was probably at home now. They walked up the front steps opened the front door and looked around for said sin. But the distant blaring of the phone caught their attention. Envy was the closet to the phone so he answered it.

"Yo?" he said his expression changed from annoyed to surprised "It's Al says he has something to tell ya"

Ed took the phone "Hello?" he could here giggles of laughter in the background. Girls? Maybe he couldn't tell.

"Brother? Brother guess what!"

"Um you broke up with Winry?"

"Brother not funny but it is related to Winry!"

"Al just tell me"

"WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!" the younger boy shouted happily but so loud that Envy could here what he said and he hiccupped and gagged "Are you kidding me?" he snapped Ed gave him a warning look.

"Wow… Al that's great" he said shakily.

"I know isn't? Winry wanted to invite you, Envy and Wrath-chan it's going to happen in a few weeks so we could really use you're help brother, she would really appreciate it"

"Yeah if she really wants us there, we'll come okay"

"Thanks brother its means a lot to me to"

"We'll be there in few days"

"Ok brother" and then he hung up.

Ed slammed the phone down on the cradle and walked into the living room, he plopped down onto the couch running his hands through his hair.

"HE IS TO YOUNG WINRY THAT FUCKING WHORE!" he growled Envy sat down beside him and leaned on the younger male's shoulder, "I've been telling you that slut is up to no good" he mumbled.

"Yeah, yeah you're always right after all"

"Damn straight"

"That's why I love you" he said kissing his boyfriend's forehead.

"You better love me, I am carrying you're babies"

"I would love you regardless, and you know that"

"Ed-_san _and nii-san?"

The couple on the couch looked towards the doorway to see Wrath dressed in his usual black t-shirt, jean shorts and sandles. He looked like he had been crying recently if the red puffyness of his navy blue eyes was any indication. "Wrath why were you crying?" Envy asked getting to his feet.

"That bitch she had called here earlier"

"And what did she say to you?"

"She rubbed it in my face that Al-chan is going to be hers forever now"

" WINRY I AM GONNA PUT THAT WHORE IN THE ICU!" Ed growled

"Can I help Ed?"

"OF COURSE!"

"HELL YA!"

"She's lucky that I'm pregnant with twins otherwise she'd be six feet under by now"

Ed grabbed the phone from the hallway, and dialed the train station to see when the next train to Resembol would be departing he had some choice words for a certain blonde bimbo. Wrath had packed his clothes up already, knowing that his brother and Ed wouldn't give up the chance to give Winry a piece of their minds.

Envy was upstairs deciding if he would pack his usual homunculi attire or not. The slim fitting cropped top and skort had always given him good flexibility, Ed had seen that first hand many a times. But as he stared at it and his current girth that was becoming less of choice. His belly had swelled up to such an extent that he didn't think he would be able to fit the skort over his hips, the top would have been fine if it didn't show off his midriff which Zita had told him he would have to cover if he didn't want half of Central finding out about his little secret. Ed came upstairs with an evil grin plastered to his face but he saw Envy's angry look and it fell.

"Envy you ok?"

"Edo do you think I'm fat?"

"Huh? No why?"

"Look at me, I mean come on I would be lucky if I can even fit my skort!"

"Envy you are not fat, why would I lie to you"

"Because you don't want to hurt my feelings, I AM FAT ARENT I?"

"Koi you're not fat, you just are getting a bit of a belly because of the twins!"

"A BIT? I'M A FUCKING WHALE!"

"No you are not!"

"LIAR YES I AM!"

Envy grabbed the alarm clock off his bedside table and launched it at his lover's head, the blonde barley dodged the projectile by a mere quarter of an inch as it collided with the wall and smashed into a million pieces. Ed looked over his shoulder to see the decimated clock 'that could have been my head' he squeaked in his head.

"DAMMIT I MISSED! HOLD STILL CHIBI-BASTARD!"

"NO WAY SO YOU CAN KILL ME I DON'T THINK SO!"

The sin just grabbed another object, Ed's prized 100 Hundred Alchemies: 100 Cultures book out of the blonde's drawer and made it a deadly missile. This time it made contact, the boy gripped his arm where the book and nicked him.

"SHIT ENVY YOU'RE NOT FAT I SWEAR! NOW PLEASE WILL YOU STOP THROWING STUFF AT ME!"

Wrath had heard the commotion and stared in disbelief and made a mental note to never call his brother fat. Lest he find a knife in his eye, yes he would heal but still didn't make it any less painful to experience.

"WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER!"

"GOMEN, GOMEN YOU THIN VERY THIN KOI I SWEAR!"

Envy stopped mid throw and he released the object and it fell to the floor, the homunculus smiled sweetly "You think I'm really thin?" the blonde nodded feverishly and unshielded his head "OH YOU SAY THE SWEETEST THINGS CHIBI!" Ed stared numbly as the sin went from super pissed off to overly cheery in a mil second.

"Anyway Envy did you pack up all you're clothes?"

"All the ones I can fit"

"You can't wear those clothes" he said dryly while picking up the sin's old skort and top.

"Why not?" he asked eyes narrowed.

"Because the babies need more room you'll suffocate them trying to wear this, we'll go shopping for maternity clothes later"

"Ma-m-maternity?"

"Yes maternity you're carrying twins don't forget that Envy, and I highly doubt they'll appreciate being crushed against the tight leather"

"I can still fit those clothes you baka I don't need maternity clothes" he pouted stubborn as all hell as always.

"Envy I am not going to argue with you on this! Your wearing maternity whether you like it or not, now come on we're going right now, Wrath do me a favor and lock all those old clothes away!"

"Hai Ed-san!"

"TRAITOR!"

"Gomen nii-san"

Envy was shoved into the car, while Ed started it. They pulled into the shopping square, people gave them funny looks when they noticed Envy was growling at Ed as the blonde dragged him towards Baby Paradise (A/N. Corny right? couldn't think of anything else) the only multiple baby store in Central.

"Come on Envy it wont be that bad, just look around"

"No I don't want to!"

"HELLO! HOW CAN I HELP YOU!" a teenage salesgirl asked loudly pulling up along side them.

"Actually yes you can miss?"

"Victoria! Now what are you and you're friend looking for?"

"Um clothes for a friend she is having twins, her boyfriend told us that she wont buy any clothes saying she will still be able to fit into her old clothes" he said slowly turning to give the sin a dirty look.

"Girl find whatever will fit ok"

"Ok miss"

"MISS?"

Ed quickly grabbed his boyfriend before he could bum rush the poor raven haired girl and tare her apart.

Envy was going to rip that sweet sickening smile off the girl's face if he got a hold of her pretty little neck. Victoria came back with a large arsenal of shirts, pants, shorts and pjs.

"How about this?" she asked picking a baby blue t-shirt with a train embroided into the fabric and the words 'Motherhood Bound'.

The green haired boy's eye brow twitched.

"Hell no!"

"I like it, we'll take that one" Ed replied cheekily.

"Oi chibi! You want me to castrate you in front of this girl?" Envy growled grabbing Ed hand and squeezed whispering the last bit into his boyfriend's ear.

Victoria stared at them blankly in confusion, she just picked up another shirt this one a dark emerald green with 'Baby on bored' written on it. Envy liked it and nodded, he just liked the color not so much the words, he could have the blonde blot the words out with alchemy later.

The raven picked up a black t-shirt, it had a skull on it, the words read 'Don't mess with my baby' she looked down at the shirt "Oh no, I'm so sorry this is from the Goth section I'll put it back" the sin shook his head "Nah I like it put on the pile" she nodded forlornly.

"Ok what about this?" she lifted another black shirt a bottle was embroided into the shirt.

"Yeah I think she will like it"

"Ok is that it?"

"Yep we're gonna miss our train if we stay here any longer" Ed said as he paid for the clothes.

They walked out and went back to the house to pick up Wrath who was waiting on the front steps with their bags. Envy gave his baby brother a particular sour look, he went into the house grabbed raw drumstick from the fridge. "ENVY? What the hell did Zita tell you about the uncooked meat!" Ed howled as the sin got back into the car.

"Not to, but I'm really hungry sue me"

"Ugh whatever but if you get sick in the new car, I am officially banning meat in the house!"

"Don't jinx me you baka!"

On the drive to the train station Wrath was day dreaming in the backseat imagining if he was the one marrying Alphonse. He sighed happily Envy turned around from leaning on the car door to see the goofy smile plastered to the younger sin's face. "Yo Wrath we're here!" he called waving his hand in front of the raven haired boy's face.

Wrath snapped out of his daze and quickly got out of the car and grabbed his bags out of the trunk. A military officer was waiting by the car, Envy flinched and hid behind Ed. "Its okay he doesn't know" he whispered to the worried sin.

"Mr. Elric we have been told by General Mustang to take you're vehicle home for you, is that alright?"

"Yeah tell Mustang thanks for me"

The man nodded taking the keys and pulled away, Envy came out from behind his lover sighing in relief.

"Wait does Mustang know?"

"About what?"

"Us? The babies! Does he know or not?"

"He knows, everyone under his command knows and they no better then to tell anybody outside of our clique"

"Good" he said daring a small pat to his midsection.

They boarded the train taking their seats, the compartment was small but Ed made it bigger by removing the small table that usually was in the middle for meals.

The train began to move slowly forward, Wrath stared out the window watching as the hills started to roll past them as the train picked up speed. Edward was reading a letter he had found in the mailbox it was a wedding invitations Winry had made sure they got to them before anyone else. Envy was lying on Ed's legs on his back sleeping, his hand resting on the growing curve of his belly.

"Ed-san do you think Al-chan will go through with the wedding?"

"I don't know, if he really cares about Winry then there is nothing we can do"

"I hope he says no"

"Yeah I do to but we can only hope"

A couple hours later, the train came to a halt "All passengers for Resembol, this is your stop" the conductor called over the PA system. Ed shook Envy awake lightly, the sin grumbled but got off Ed's legs and to his feet. They set off onto the platform, looking around for a familier mop of bronze/blonde hair.

"Nii-san!"

The group turned around to see Alphonse bounding up to them, the boy was smiling but it seemed forced and painful at the same time.

"Hey Al, how's Winry?" Ed asked through clenched teeth.

"She's fine, her and Granny are waiting for us outside with the car"

"Well lets not keep them waiting, lets go"

Everyone had managed to fit into Pinako's old 1900 Ford Model T, Envy had been given the front seat, Wrath and Al were squished into the back, and poor Ed sitting with Winry. The blonde had his hands fisted in his lap, Winry was trying to ignore the hostility coming from the three new comers in her grandmother's car. Well what did she expect? She was marrying the brother of a very overprotective, short tempered (no pun indented) State Alchemist.

When they got to the Rockbell residence, Envy was out of the car first, the bumpy roads of Resembool hadn't made the ride to the home enjoyable for him. He had run to the nearest bush and puked up his recent meal all over the shrub. Ed had held his hair back for him and rubbed gentle circles on his back.

"Ewww" he heard Winry whisper he ignored her.

"Envy you ok now?"

"Yeah *gag* I'm fine, I think"

"Oh you poor thing, lets get you some water" Pinako said kindly helping the sin into the house, Winry made a sound of disgust but everyone ignored her. Envy had gone to bed in the spare bedroom that the brothers had used when they came to visit the Rockbell family while they searched for ways to get their old bodies back.

"Hey brother, how has Envy-san been?"

"He's alright, we found out that its twins" Ed said smirking at the dark cloud that now hung over Winry's head. "Oh that's amazing nii-san!" the older brother nodded.

"Yeah it'll be great, it would be even better if you could be there when the babies are born"

"When's the due date?"

"Dr. H doesn't know, she told Envy that he could go into premature labor because multiple babies come a lot sooner then normal, so we aren't sure yet"

"Oh well I'll come back to Central and stay for the last few months"

"Bu-bu-but Al? We we're gonna go on a 4 month honeymoon you promised!"

"Winry, I'm not gonna miss my nephews' or nieces' being born for some stupid honeymoon!"

Ed watched them argue curiously, 'Not even married yet, and their already at each others throats' he thought. "Anyway nii-san I'll be there don't worry" Winry hissed and left out of the room Al looked after her "Brother I'll be right back promise" and then the boy disappeared to look for his girlfriend.

"This was probably a mistake"

He turned around to see Pinako, she was busy tying silver bows around the envelopes containing the invitations for the wedding.

"What's mistake?"

"This wedding, them being together, Al had never really like, liked Winry she had been more like a big sister then a lover to him, he told me himself the other day after they had gotten into an argument just like the one they just had"

"What were they arguing about?"

"About you're lover, Envy right?" he nodded "Well it was about, him being pregnant Winry doesn't believe it"

"Or more like she can't except it"

"Yes, she had told me that the boy had lied just so you would stay with him, she said you wouldn't abandon you're children"

"She's right about that, but she lied , Envy is almost 4 months pregnant matter a fact it'll hit the 2nd trimester tomorrow"

"I know, Al had told me before Winry did and if it is coming from him it was with out a doubt the truth"

"It doesn't bother you?"

"Please give me a little credit Ed, I am used to the strange ever since that time when you and Al had tried to bring you're mother back to life, so finding out you're boyfriend is 4 months pregnant is no big deal"

"Hmm, anyway who all is Winry inviting?"

"Mainly old friends you guys went to school with, and some of the people she met in Central and that strange girl from Rush Valley"

"Paninya?"

"That's the one"

Ed rolled his eyes, the dark skinned girl could be annoying and overbearing he didn't think he could sit in the church with her before he lost his mind and punched her lights out. Not that he would of course he still had some manners when it came to girls, his mother had raised him better then that.

An hour later the younger Elric still hadn't returned from talking with Winry, the blonde guessed that they had probably gone somewhere to talk it out where no one else would here them. But much to his surprise Winry returned a few minutes after he had figured they had gone out. Without Alphonse.

"Hey Edo" she purred sitting in the seat opposite of him.

"Winry where's Al?"

"Huh?"

"Where's Al?"

"Oh he and I are taking a breather from each other, he is going out to eat while I stay here"

"Why didn't you just stay with him?"

"Because he wanted to be alone"

He stared at her in disbelief, she claims she loves his brother yet here she was while he was out instead of with him trying to sort out their problems together.

"More like you just wanted to be alone with me"

"Ed seriously I'm getting married to your brother, I don't want you" she lied

"Bullshit" he grumbled getting to his feet, Pinako heard him and shook her head. "You guys be back down here for dinner understand?" she called after him.

"Yeah I here ya Granny"

0o0o0 _With Al _0o0o0

Al was sitting alone in the small diner in Resembol, wondering if he was making the right decision in marrying the annoying blonde girl. She had been his best friend since childhood, but maybe they were better off being just that friends nothing more, because now all they did was argue they had done very little of that when they were younger.

"Hey Al-chan!"

He looked up to see Wrath entering through the door, the raven haired boy was smiling at him.

"Alphonse you ok?" he asked sitting in the seat across from the blonde.

"Yeah I'm fine why do you ask?"

"I heard you and that bitch from outside"

"Wrath don't call her a bitch ok, she's not that bad"

"You're kidding right?"

"No I'm not, she's trying to be friendly but you, Envy and nii-san are all against her!"

"Because she doesn't care about you! All she wants is you're brother Al that's all she wants!"

Al stared at him, his fringe falling over his eyes, the blonde rose to his feet. "Look she's the girl I wanna marry why cant my family respect that?" he murmured "Al me an-" but the boy cut him off "Nii-san is having children with Envy-san so I see you guys as family too!" he walked out of the diner loudly making the bell above the door clink franticly.

The sin quickly followed him, he grabbed the boy's arm Al was about to shake him off till he saw the hurt in Wrath eyes. He felt bad for yelling at the sin, "Gomen Wrath-chan" he apologized.

"It's okay Al-chan"

Wrath leaned into Al's chest giving him a hug, the older of the two smiled wrapping his arms around the sin as well. But what happened next was a shock to both of them, the blonde had lifted Wrath's chin and planted a small but still passionate kiss on the boy's petal pink lips. The raven stared in shock, the Elric wasn't to happy either he let go of the boy and quickly fled to the Rockbell house.

What had he just done? Kissed another boy, cheated on his fiancé, broken a promise of never doing anything to hurt her. He had become lower then scum, what would happen if she found out? She would no doubt leave him for someone who cared about her.

"Alphonse!" he looked up from panting to see Ed standing on the porch, his hair was in a loose ponytail, a tank top and shorts.

"Nii-san…"

"Al what's up? Why are you out of breath? What happened?"

"I, I…" but he couldn't finish his sentence, just hung his head in shame. They both heard the soft crunch of gravel as feet crossed the driveway.

"Wrath where were you?"

The sin shook his head, and walked into the house without saying a word or even acknowledging Al, Pinako, Winry, or even his own brother's presence. He sat down on the couch small tears trailing down his face, he had always wanted the older boy to kiss him, love him, hold him. But that look in Al's eyes told him the boy didn't return his feelings, not yet.

"Ira-chan" he looked up to see Envy standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest and a frown in place.

"What happened? You're in tears and Al-chibi is upset to"

"I, he, we…"

"He kissed you didn't he?"

"Uh huh, but he doesn't love me, like I love him"

"He's confused you baka, he doesn't know if he loves you or loves the blonde bitch"

"Well he needs to make up his mind"

"It doesn't work like that!"

"Why not?"

"Because it just doesn't, if it did the world would be in a whole lot of trouble"

"How so?"

"You would have guys constantly cheating on their girls, and vice versa"

"That made no sense nii-san"

"Eh so what, now wipe your face"

Wrath dragged his arm over his nose, wiping away the tears and small amount of snout that was trying to run down his nose.

Envy took a seat beside him, Wrath getting up to help him sit but the older sin swatted his hand away. "Don't treat me like an invalid" he grumbled the younger boy dropped his hands at his sides.

"Now if you go and actually talked to the little chibi, and asked him how he feels about the whole situation I'm sure he will tell you everything"

"But I don't-"

"Don't give me that! Are you a homunculi? Or are you a pathetic rat? Go fight for him if you love him as much as you say don't let her take him away from you!"

Envy pushed his baby brother out of the living room and into the kitchen where Al, Ed and Pinako were sitting eating dinner. They all looked up from their plates, silence fell over the room as Wrath sat beside Alphonse. Ed quickly put his plate in the sink and took his leave, Pinako following shortly after informing them that she would keep Winry out of the kitchen while they talked.

"Wrath I-"

"No let me talk Al"

"…"

"I am glad you kissed me"

"Huh?"

"You heard me"

"But why? Brother told me about that girl Carmen"

"That's my friend at school, I'm gay Al-chan"

"…."

"Does it bother you?"

Al just got up from his seat walked past Wrath, the blonde was still confused "Wrath I need time to think about what you just told me" he said as he climbed the stairs. The raven heard the bedroom door open slam, he regretted telling the boy now, maybe Al didn't swing that way? Or was he just to scared and confused like he said?

Envy heard the exchange of words and comforted his baby brother who was once again in tears, in one day because of that Elric boy.

"Don't worry about, he'll come around Wrath"

"No he won't, he loves her!"

"Wrath" the boy turned to look at his brother only to have the older sin's palm connect with his face.

"You stupid idiot, honestly I think you're more human then you let on! WE HOMUNCULI NEVER LET OUR PRIZE GET AWAY FROM US!" Envy sure was turning into a good pep talk giver.

"NOW YOU GO UPSTAIRS AND CLAIM HIM AS YOURS OR YOU'LL BE ALONE THE REST OF YOU'RE IMMORTAL LIFE WONDERING WHAT MIGHT A BEEN!"

Wrath squeaked and bolted up the stairs, he found the door Al had gone into. He opened it Alphonse was sitting on the edge of the bed Winry was no where to be seen.

"Al"

"Hmm? Oh its you"

"Yeah me, where's Winry?"

"Brother told me, she had gone out with a old classmate of ours to a club in the town across the river"

"Oh how long will she be gone?"

"Hours probably why?"

"Oh no reason"

The raven claimed the spot besides the blonde, Al didn't seem comfortable with the sin so close, but he made no protest when Wrath's palm rested on his thigh. Alphonse looked down at the hand, and smiled he did like the sin now that he came to terms, but he didn't want to leave Winry either. But he would have to choose soon. Before either of them knew it, they were kissing, there was no blushes, no slip ups nothing to cover up this. The heat seemed to sky rocket as their lips locked, tongues melting into each other. They were so lost in the passion they hadn't heard the soft click of the door opening or closing again. Ed had gone to check up on his brother, Envy had informed him about the conversation when he came up stairs.

"What were they doing?"

"Making OUT!" Ed squeaked he hoped to God, Winry wouldn't return for awhile because from the way Al and Wrath were rocking against each other they would probably be hearing some very familier sounds emanating from the bedroom across the hall.

"_Al right there!"_

"Ed why the hell did you have to right?" Envy groaned pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Not my fault"

"Yes it is, you talked with Al didn't you!"

"So what if I did? You talked to Wrath to"

"Oh well, nothing we can do about it now"

"Yeah aww man!"

"What?" but the blonde didn't even need to tell him, because he looked down to see a large bugle in the younger male's shorts.

"I forgot to ask Zita if it was ok!"

"Chibi-baka!"

"So still you cou-"

"No I'm tired, you get off yourself" he grumbled rolling over and plugging his ears to blocked Al and Wrath's moans.

"Awww you're so stiff!"

"I'm not horny right now sue me"

"I thought that book she gave us said some girls get hornier when their pregnant"

"You just answered your own question chibi, SOME girls do but right now this GUY wants to sleep now go to the bathroom or something take a cold shower! Because there is no way in Hell you're getting this bed with me while you got a fucking erection"

Ed grumbled all the way to the bathroom, ignoring the pleasure filled gasp and moans coming from the bedroom down the hall. He took a quick shower and went back to the room, Envy was asleep by the time he got back. Ear plugs were in his ears, the blonde removed them seeing as the intercourse across the hall had ended. He fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

* * *

Yay Al and Wrath had sex! YAY for pervyness XD

Well chapter 6 will be up in a few days at best, no promises because well I'm busy with school, finals are next week so I have to study.

Well Winry will be showing up in the next chapter, you guys will get the hints of the cat fight in the chapter, then in chapter 7 meow cat fight most defiantly. Because well you get this spoiler the only one because Winry finds out about our little lover boys, and that Wrath is you take a guess *smirks evilly*

Oh yea to answer Jrlock's question about the italic honerfications its because in the Japanese dub they always had the Ed-kun or Roy-sama in italics so I tried to follow that, but I wont do it anymore because well I'm to lazy to now.

Jazz: Hey am I gonna get a chance to be in the story?

Maybe if you're a good little sister and don't bug me anymore

Jazz: Ok wait you're not gonna make me a lezzy are you?

*evil smirk* maybe now get lost

Jazz: YOU ARE AN EVIL LITTLE SHRIMP!

*eye brow twitches* WTF DID YOU JUST CALL ME?

Jazz: YOU HEARD ME SHRIMP!

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU SAID COMERE YA LITTLE!

(Chases Jazz all around the room) while I'm busy killing my bratty sister you enjoy this chapter and R&R if you do you will get a cookie :D or two chapters in one day you vote on which you rather prefer! GET BACK HERE-! *Shouting gets more distant*.


	6. Winry Gets a Wake Up Call

The Unexpected Ch 6 :D

Woohoo Wrath and Al did the naughty and you know just to spite Winry, I'm gonna let her find out in this chapter because I hate her that much XD

**DISCLAIMER: Seriously if I owned FMA there would be no plot, just good ol' yaoi XD.**

* * *

Chapter 6 Winry Gets a Wake Up Call a Very Nasty Wake Up Call

The sun had begun to rise on Resembol, the barren fields and rolling hills gave it the classic country feel. But the atmosphere was far from pleasant, up the road from on the fields owned by the local farmer. Was the Rockbell residence, it faded sunny yellow shingles, only tried to hide the hostility coming from the home.

Winry waved goodbye to Jasmine (A/N. There you happy Jazz you got your part) her friend since elementary. She walked up the front steps of the porch pulling her key and unlocked the door. Oh yes she had enjoyed herself last night, sleeping with the stripper Jasmine had gotten her at the club they attended, but now she would have to talk it over with Alphonse.

"Wow you're home early" she flinched turning around to see her grandmother.

"Granny don't scare me like that!"

"Sorry dear, are you hungry?"

"Oh no thanks, I ate breakfast already"

"You sure?"

"Yeah anyways where's Al granny?"

"Upstairs I believe, sleeping you can wait till he wakes up"

"Well I suppose, but I really need to talk with him"

"It can wait, now sit and tell me all about the club"

"Um…"

And if by divine intervention Edward wobbled down the stairs, his blonde hair had come loose in the middle of the night cascading over his shoulders like a golden waterfall.

"Edo!"

"HI Winry"

"How'd you sleep?"

"I have had better nights" he grumbled.

"Oh well I can make it better if you let me"

"Back off bitch" a new voice snarled from behind the Elric.

"Oh Envy you're still alive shame.." she grouched.

"What was that? I don't speak retard!"

"I'm not a retard!"

"Could a fooled me!"

"Enough! Envy sit down and eat, you don't have any business arguing or getting into scuffles you're a teetering four and half months pregnant time to settle down" Pinako growled from her perch on the stool.

He gave Winry one final death glare before taking his seat beside Edward. Pinako was the only person trying to make conversation at the table, the other three refused to speak. The silence stretched till the sound of new footsteps entered the tiny kitchen. "Ahh Wrath and Al you graced us with your presence" Pinako remarked pointing towards their plates on the counter.

The two new comers took their seats and were silent during the rest of breakfast. Till Winry opened her big mouth of course.

"Al can you take me to Rush Valley this weekend so I can pick up Paninya?"

"When I have time Winry"

"Oh you never have time!"

"Well unlike **YOU **I've been trying to plan our wedding instead of going out every night with strangers!"

"Don't even go there Alphonse!"

"No I will go there Winry! I am sick and tired of doing all of the work by myself ever since brother arrived you been up his ass!"

"I have not!"

"BULLSHIT!" the entire table became silent, the words, those dirty provocative words didn't sound right coming from the usually quiet and well mannered of the Elric brothers. Pinako put a wrinkled hand on the boy's clenched fist "Calm down now, there is no need for this violence" she growled.

"Sorry Granny" he said sounding deflated and tired as if the little argument had drained him of the little bit of energy that he had.

"Slut"

"Fuck you bean bandit!"

"No thanks"

"Wasn't offering!"

"Sure sounded like it, not that I was interested"

"You wish you could have me, wish I was crying your name but hell will freeze over when that happens!"

"Don't go getting a big head!"

"To late for that ira-chan"

"WHO THE HELL ASKED YOU FOR YOU'RE TWO SENSE ENVY-JUKA!"

"I GAVE IT REGARDLESS SO GO FUCK YOURSELF!"

"OH YOU'D LIKE THAT WOULDN'T YOU!"

"BAH YOU HEARTLESS BITCH!"

"THAT'S FUCKING IT HAVE HAD IT WITH THIS CUNT!" Winry launched herself over the table her hands mere inches from Envy snarling mouth. He grabbed her hands and slammed her down on the table before she reached his neck. He stood up and with unnatural balance for someone who was carrying 20lbs of babies through the middle managed to lift her up and toss her across the kitchen into the cabinets.

"WINRY!" Al shouted running to her side, her lip was cut and her left eye had nasty clean cut just above the eyebrow.

"CHIBI YOU BETTER GET YOU'RE BROTHER BEFORE I TARE HIM APART FOR JUST BEING NEXT TO HER!"

"Al get away from her, he's not kidding!"

Winry grabbed onto Al's forearms refusing to let go, her grip like a vice.

Envy growled his eyes darkening. "Aw shit" Ed shouted he grabbed Pinako and Wrath running out of the house. "Nii-san?" Wrath shouted the blonde tightened his grip on the raven. "Ed-san whats going on with nii-san why is he so mad?" he shook his head "I don't know, but we're gonna find out".

And right on cue the earth began to shake, the Rockbell home trembled. The front door blasted open Al running out with a screeching Winry in his arms, she was cry and screaming at the same time. The blue eyes were wild and unfocused, what had she seen that made her become so terrified?

"_**GET BACK HERE YOU CUNT NUGGET!" **_a loud grating voice bellowed from within the house. With a final shake the home started to collapse in on it's self. In its place was tall green skin creature which resembled a dog with a dragon thrown into the mix. The monsters one eye was purple with the white complete black encircling it, the other well more like others were the color of the Philosopher's stone. Envy's middle was more swelled and defined in this form possibly because this form was more suitable for caring the brunt weight of the twins.

"**GET OVER HERE! SO I CAN TARE YOU FUCKIN FACE OFF!"**

"AL KEEP THAT BAKEMONO AWAY FROM ME!"

"ENVY STOP IT!"

"**FUCK YOU ALL!" **he screamed, his tail like a windshield whipper destroying whatever was left of the house. Ed told Pinako and Wrath to hide, while he delt with the pissed of mommy to be. Al had set Winry on her feet, but she still clawed at his hands to get him to pay attention to her. "Brother you need to calm him down now!" the older brother gave the blonde a dry look. "I AM AWARE OF THAT ALPHONSE!" he snapped clapping his hands together.

"YOU BITCH YOU DESTROYED MY HOME, MY EVERYTHING!"

"WINRY SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU'RE MAKING IT WORSE!

"FUCK YOU SHRIMP!"

Envy roared angrily gaining the attention of the bickering teens below him, Ed reached to pat a clawed foot but the sin just swiped at him. He lowered his head so that Winry and he were at semi eye level.

"**I could crush right now you know that? I could just crush you end this bullshit but I wont not yet I'm just gonna play with you for awhile"**

"You're a monster!"

He just chuckled, his dark rumbling voice echoing around them. **"You've know that since you met me, whore" **she whimpered when the clawed paw grabbed her from off the ground. Envy squeezed his paw, she gasped scratching at his hand. "LET ME GO BAKEMONO!" she wailed tears streaming down her face in waterfalls.

"**Nothin doin brat"**

'Envy please put her down!"

"KOI STOP IT RIGHT NOW THINK OF THE TWINS!"

But he just continued to ignore the brothers, and just continued to squeeze the life out of Winry. He didn't release the stupid bitch till her face turned blue. Winry's limp body fell to the ground, Al wrapped his arms around her brushing the blonde side locks out of her face. She was breathing but just barley. Envy shrunk back down to his preferred form, flicking a green tendril over his pale shoulder. A bored expression wilted its way on to his face.

"Drama queen I didn't even squeeze that hard"

"You squeezed her hard enough Envy!"

"Ne chibi-chan don't get so mad"

"Envy" he growled.

"Granny! Hospital now!"

"Alphonse she doesn't need a hospital, I can look after her" the old woman said coming out from behind the trees.

"O-o-okay if you think that's best"

"Ed fix the house, you should be able to"

"Yeah I can do that, Wrath you can help if you want"

"Ok Ed-san"

With the combined strength of Ed and Wrath the house, rematerialized within seconds. Alphonse laid Winry down on the repaired couch, his handsome face twisted into pure concern. Pinako said Winry would be fine, that is if she didn't decide to pick another fight with Envy or Wrath. Regardless of being 4 months pregnant Envy was still dangerous to everyone's health.

"And speaking of Envy where is he?" Ed asked. Everyone stopped looking over Winry to look around the living room. The green haired homunculus was no where to be found. Till they heard a loud banging coming from the kitchen, Wrath entered the room first. Envy was busy devouring Pinako's freshly cut lamb, the blood seeped from his lips and clogged his finger nails. The raven haired boy grimaced. "Ed-san!" he called, Ed walked through the archway and glared at the sight.

"Envy.." he said in a dangerous tone.

"Hmm?"

"What the hell did I say about the meat!"

"Well sorry! But you're brat is saying eat the meat!"

"Cravings are one thing, turning cannibal is another!"

"CANNIBALS EAT PEOPLE NOT ANIMALS YOU STUPID SHRIMPY BASTARD!"

"GAH YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN DAMMIT!"

The loud bickering awoke the battered Winry Rockbell from her slumber. She rubbed her aching head and stumbled to her feet. Al turned from the arguing lovers to see his fiancé swaying around in a drunken like stupor.

"Winry you're not supposed to be on you're feet yet go back in there and lay down!"

"No way in hell am I going back to sleep, I own that mother fucking juka a wrench to the face!"

"Leave him alone!"

"Fuck off Al!" she growled shoving past him into the kitchen.

"BITCH!" Envy turned from looking at Ed to having Winry fist coming towards his face.

He was knocked from his perch, landing on his back. Edward was stunned then he saw red. He grabbed Winry's shoulders and flung her into the fridge, boxes came down on her. Wrath added in his two senses and kicked her in the face then in the stomach.

"YOU STUPID CUNT MY NII-SAN IS PREGNANT AND YOU HIT HIM!" Wrath screamed.

"STUPID JUKA SHOULDN'T BE PREGNANT IN THE FIRST PLACE!"

"IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT HE SHOULDN'T BE THAT FACT BEING HIS IS! AND YOU FUCKING HIT HIM YOU STUPID PHYSCO BITCH!" Ed snarled punching Winry's bruised face with his Automail arm.

"AL ARE YOU NOT GONNA HELP ME?" Winry screamed thrashing under Ed and Wrath's furious punches and kicks.

No reply, Al ignored her. He was tending to Envy, Pinako's footsteps could be heard and she burst into the kitchen. The scene before her, made her unlit pipe dangle from the corner of her mouth in pure shock.

"What the hell is wrong with all of you?"

"YOU'RE GRANDAUGHTER HIT MY PREGNANT LOVER THAT'S WHAT!"

"Winry! What has gotten into you?"

"She doesn't need a lecture she needs a fucking punch in the gut!" Wrath hissed.

"Al let me see him!"

Al got out of the way, his face contorted into a pure rage. His bronze eyes landing on Winry, "You have to be the dumbest woman I have ever met!" she stared dully at him. "I never wanted this! All I wanted was Ed and that stupid transvestite got in my way!" she howled madly.

"Oh so you never cared about me at all?"

"USE THAT DAMN BRAIN OF YOURS FOR ONCE ALPHONSE I NEVER LOVED YOU!"

"Thanks that's all I needed to hear"

"YOU'RE FUCKING WELCOME! NOW PUT ME DOWN SO I KILL THAT CUNT!"

"You're gonna hurt anyone Winry" Ed growled pinning her left arm while Wrath pinned the other.

Alphonse looked back down at Envy, the sin was breathing heavily but he seemed alright none the less. His pale arms were wrapped around his bulging middle, Pinako made sure the twins were fine.

"You're lucky they didn't get hurt bitch" Wrath growled.

"Yeah, otherwise you would be six feet under"

"Bitch" Al snapped.

"Al don't waste you're breath on her"

"No I have got something to tell her!"

"You sure you wanna do that?"

"Yes I am"

Ed nodded releasing his grip on Al's shoulder, the younger blonde inched to the beaten figure on the floor.

"You want to know something Winry?"

"Fuck off!"

"No you're gonna listen to me!"

"I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ANYTHING!"

"I slept with Wrath last night"

"YOU SON OF A- what? What did you say?"

"You heard me"

"YOU CHEATING SON OF A BITCH!"

"Oh please, not like you haven't cheated on me a good 5 times, I know about the stripper, the dick wad called here looking for you this morning!"

"Bu-bu-t Al!"

"Nope I don't want to hear any of you're excuses shut up, we're done I gonna be somebody who wont go behind my back and lie AND to top it off hit someone who is pregnant!" he snapped taking Wrath's hand in his.

The younger sin smiled, putting his hand on his belly. He had found out earlier that he pregnant, he could feel it already his body was changing internally just like his brother's must have. Winry saw the motion and screamed, she grabbed his blonde hair screeching as if the devil himself was after her.

Al hadn't noticed, he was to busy enjoying Winry's suffering.

Winry shook, violently, hands unclenching from her hair. She stumbled to her feet, hand fumbled on one of the drawers till a small kitchen knife was in her hand.

"YOU ARE NOT LEAVING ME I WONT LET YOU!"

And then she ran towards them, her eyes dulled to a cauliflower blue, knife glinted in the warm kitchen light…...

* * *

And,….. Dramatic cut off :D I know I'm evil but hey authors are supposed to make things suspenseful XD

Ne do you think I should let Wrath kill Winry? Or let somebody else handle it? Maybe…. One of the other homunculi I will decide which one because Lust I like her might just make it her do it..

Anyways R&R please, please it keeps the authoress happy! And more chapters will come byes!


	7. Omake

Omake J

This is my first omake, just a filler chapter kinda till chapter 7 comes out okay? You guys can wait for a little bit. Just because I know I promised a cat fight in chapter 7 well I am still thinking of how that chapter will turn out so please be patient with me kk huggles :D

Omake: NEVER TOUCH ME AGAIN!

Edward Elric had, had his brush with bad luck. Mostly surrounding his quest for the Philosopher's Stone 2 years ago. He had been almost killed several times, and even that had been barley nothing. Compared to what he was going through right now!

"YOU EVER COME NEAR ME AGAIN WITH YOU'RE COCK I WILL CUT IT OFF I SWEAR DAMMIT!" Envy screamed has another contraction belted him in the groin. He had been in labor for only 20 minutes, Ed had been stupid enough to offer his boyfriend his hand. The Sin gritted his teeth, Edward heard his right hand crack under the pressure Envy was applying to it.

"NEXT TIME YOU CARRY THE BABIES!"

"Ok one: that impossible! Two: I WOULD PASS REGARDLESS!"

"FUCK!"

"Just breath!"

"SHUT UP DAMN YOU, YOUR PENIS IS GONE WHEN THIS OVER YOU HEAR ME!"

"NO LEAVE MY WEINER ALONE!" Ed shouted when Envy released his hand and made to reach for his crotch.

Zita was busy making sure her equipment was sterile for performing the C-section.

"Envy stop trying to castrate Ed now, I'm going to make the cut" she said as she wiped the round, clenching mound of flesh.

"HURRY UP AND GET THESE DAMN BABIES OUT OF ME!"

"Here we go" she murmured drawing the scalpel across his belly.

Ed stared at the scene for a moment till he saw Zita's hands grip something in Envy's bleeding tummy. Then like most fathers do when they see the sight of their children being born he fainted. Zita stared down at him in disbelief, "Nurse!, can you take this boy to the waiting room!" she called. A man came out from behind a closed door and threw the unconscious blonde over his shoulder and walked out of the delivery room.

"Nii-san?"

"He fainted didn't he?"

"Yes he did"

"Ugh brother"

"Al don't act high and mighty because if you faint while I'm in labor I won't ever let you forget it"

Ed came to see Al and a 5 month pregnant Wrath staring down at him, he sat up rubbing his aching head "Ugh I fainted didn't I?" they both nodded.

"You wimp"

"Al!"

"Don't worry Ed-san I'll have the nurses take a picture while I'm having our baby"

"Thanks Wrath!"

"No problem"

The three sat in the waiting room for a little over an hour till a beaming Zita emerged from the double doors a bright twinkle in her warm eyes. "Mr. Elric you want to see you're son and daughter?" she asked sweetly. He nodded feverishly rising to his feet, Al and Wrath both gasped walking behind him and the doctor as they entered the nursery. In the room the group roamed around to find the bundles of joy.

Zita stopped in front of two cribs, she reached into one of them and lifted a small baby boy with a small tuft of golden blonde hair, Ed felt his heart swell, the child opened his eyes they were lavender purple. Zita placed the blubbering baby back into his crib then she moved on to the other and lifted the child up and showed her off. The blonde boy blinked at the child's hair it a pale blonde almost silver, then the baby girl opened her eyes they were a baby blue?

"Hey Edo!" the baby purred.

"Huh?"

"You miss me?"

"What the hell?"

"You did didn't you? Oh I knew you would wait till I get bigger!"

This can not be happening, Ed screamed. Winry was his baby?

"EDO, EDO WAKE UP DAMMIT!" somebody was shouting at him.

"AHHHH HUH?"

"You were having a nightmare you stupid shrimp!"

Then he realized he was awake, in his and Envy's bedroom, he looked at the Sin. Envy was glaring at him while he rubbed his belly still very much pregnant and not huffing and puffing. And as he looked around no psycho, evil , blue eyed baby who looked an awful lot like Winry.

"Gods!" he groaned slamming the heel of his hand into his temple "I know expecting fathers sometimes have dreams when its getting close but damn!"

Envy rolled his eyes. "Just go back to bed chibi" he muttered shutting the bedside table lamp back off and rolling over so that his back was to his lover.

"Evil Winry baby in your belly *shivers*" the light flicked back on..

"Couch NOW!" an ominous finger pointed towards the door.

_Owari_

Haha poor Edo, and no this is not exactly how Envy's actual labor will look like this some of it you will see such as the gentalia threats but that's it. And please I am begging you be patient with me while I am typing chapter 7 because I want it to be good not crappy because I wanted to hurry up and get it uploaded and done with so be patient it should be up by next week at the latest


	8. Catfight

**The Unexpected Ch 7 :D**

**Ed: Hey Kenni? Where are ya?**

**Envy: *walks in with a bucket of chicken* did you find her?**

**Ed: No I didn't little evil chibi author, she has to get these last three chapters and epilogue out before the week end and she is nowhere to be found!**

**Wrath: *walks in with Al* did you check her bedroom?**

**Al: Yea nii-san maybe she's in there**

**Ed: *grumbles* fine *walks to my room***

**Envy: Is she in there?**

**Ed finds me and pokes me: Yeah she's in here**

**Wrath: Lazy authoress**

**Al: Uh huh**

**Me: muh huh huggles *snore***

**Ed, Envy, Wrath and Al: O_O**

**Envy: Poke her with one of those pencils**

**Wrath: *grabs pencil and pokes me* **

**Me: BAH GET OFF ME DAMMIT DON'T TOUCH ME! *whacks Ed in the face***

**Ed: GAH HE'S THE ONE WHO POKED YOU WHY DID YOU HIT ME?**

**Me: Awww shut up I was up studying again leave me be *covers head with arms***

**Al: But Kenni-san you have to start writing chapter 7!**

**Me: *wakes up* AH SHIT I ALMOST FORGOT SHIT SHIT SHIT! *runs out of room to laptop***

**Disclaimer: Come on you guys know I don't own anything, I'm just a sad, disturbed 16 year old who enjoys impregnating her favorite anime characters so she can torture the living hell out of them… **

* * *

Chapter 7 Catfight Meow

_Previously_

_And then she ran towards them, her eyes dulled to a cauliflower blue, a knife glinted in the warm kitchen light….._

Winry was hell bent on killing on of the homunculi tonight, both were taking the Elric brothers away from her, claiming them, bearing the brothers' children. It disgusted her to end, what did Al and Ed see in the evil, rude sins. She decided she would kill Envy, he would be the easiest since he was pregnant. His motor skills would be slow, and he wouldn't be able to stop her.

"DIE!" she screamed throwing the knife at the sin.

"Sorry I don't take requests" he growled catching the knife mid air before it got close to his middle.

"BASTARD, YOU TOKE ED FROM ME THEN YOUR WHORE LITTLE BROTHER TOOK AL FROM ME!"

"Last time I checked, they are people, not property. I didn't know you're name was tattooed on their asses" he snapped flipping her off.

"JUKA!"

"Takes one to know one bitch"

"Al NOW!"

Winry didn't even know what hit her, Al had come behind her grabbed the small knife she had grabbed off the counter and held it against her throat.

"Be quite, I don't want to have to hurt you" he whispered into her ear.

"Bastards"

"Hmm, yeah I don't care anymore Winry"

"Sure you don't! You still love me don't you!"

"No why would I love you?"

"Yo-o-o-u, w-e-we I?"

"Shut up I said!"

Ed jabbed his thumb into her throat, she weakened in Al's grasp. Winry slumped slightly but her jaws were going.

"YOU WONT GET AWAY WITH THIS!"

"Be quiet God!" Wrath growled.

"Pinako, did you call _them_?"

The old woman nodded slowly, she was crying a little. She had never thought Winry would go this far for the Elric brothers, or more specifically Edward. The blonde boy had once confided in her and told her, that Winry was the one he wished to marry one day, but that was before he met Envy. The Sin's unearthly beauty had drawn him in, he couldn't escape. But she didn't think it was intentional for the Sin and blonde to fall in love, they had been enemies before, but now they were in love and starting a family. Winry just couldn't except it, her mind, her subconscious wouldn't allow it. She would have him she had cried when she returned home a month ago , Envy couldn't have him she would kill him, kill the infants within his womb just to take and claim Ed.

"Yes I did they should be here in a few minutes"

"Wait WHO DID YOU CALL?" Winry asked.

"Just some new friends for you to play with"

"Fri-I-I-ends? I DON'T NEED FRIENDS I NEED EDO!"

"Well you can't have him I'm afraid"

"NO I MUST HAVE HIM!" Winry cried.

The others shook their heads, Wrath had helped Envy back on his feet. Envy was glaring fiery daggers at the convulsing blonde girl. Would she ever give up? Obviously not. Wrath made a move to gag her and stop her screaming and cursing but she ended up biting his hand. Bad idea.

"BITCH!"

"GO SUCK A DICK!" Wrath drew back his fist and aimed it at her head, making a direct hit she collapsed out of Al's hold to the floor.

"WHORE!" the pregnant raven snarled, jumping on top of her gripping her blonde locks and shaking her head in a quick and painful manner.

Winry clawed at his hands kicking and thrashing underneath of him, she landed a hit to his chest and he was off her and on the floor. She climbed on top of him, scratching at his face and arms leaving small nicks in the pale flesh. His knee flew upwards and rammed into her lower stomach, knocking the breath out of her. They climbed to their feet, a mess of twisting limbs, pulled hair, and curses.

"JUKA TEME!"

"THAT MADE NO SENSE YOU STUPID SLUT!"

"WHO SAID IT HAD TO?" Winry hissed pulling his hair.

"MOTHERFUCKER!"

"YOU WOULD KNOW ALL ABOUT THAT WOULDN'T YOU? I KNOW ABOUT SLOTH HAHA YOU PATHETIC FOOL!"

"NOTHING HAPPENED BETWEEN ME AND MAMA!" he growled ripping her fingers from his hair.

"LIES ALL LIES HAHA AL YOU'RE LOVER WAS INTO INCEST!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU WHORE! YOU KNOW NOTHING!"

The two continued to curse, scream and bite. The others watched with bemused expression, all seemed to be on the fence of "Should I break up this fight? Or I shouldn't break it up?" Envy was defiantly on the "I shouldn't break it up" he was having to much fun watching his brother beat the blonde bitch to a pulp. Al was still unsure, Ed was on the same side as his lover while poor Pinako was stuck in the middle. Al had finally had enough went to grab Wrath, but the small Sin growled and refused to release his grip on Winry's blonde hair.

"Stay out of it Al!"

"LET GO OF MY HAIR!"

"AS SOON AS YOU LET GO OF MINE WHORE!"

"NEVER!"

"THEN FUCK YOU!"

"NO FUCK YOU!"

A loud knock on the front door, gained the group watching the melee's attention. "I'll get it" Pinako said waving off the others for them to watch Wrath and Winry to make sure they didn't kill each other. She opened the door a crack to see a tall broad shoulder male, dressed in a white coat with glasses.

"Are you Mrs. Pinako Rockbell?"

"Yes I am"

"We're here for Ms. Winry Rockbell" he said motioning behind him to his group of men.

"Yes I know, follow me then"

The men followed her to the loud commotion coming from the kitchen. She pointed to the blonde girl who was still trying to pry Wrath's hands from her hair, "Thank you for calling us" he murmured Ed grabbed Wrath from off the girl. One of the other men reached down a grabbed Winry from off the floor.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? LET ME GO!"

"I'm afraid I can not to do that Ms. Rockbell"

"MY NAME IS NOT ROCKBELL IT'S ELRIC!" she screamed madly.

"It's worse then we thought" another said.

The one holding her arm nodded. "Bring the jacket" on cue a white straightjacket was brought forth, he put Winry's arms into the sleeves and tied them to her body. "WHAT IS THIS GET OFF DAMN YOU!" she screeched the man shook his head "I'm sorry we can't do that, this is for you own safety and the safety of the others around you" she just thrashed trying to free her arms.

"EDO SAVE ME, DON'T LET THEM TAKE ME AWAY WE BELONG TOGETHER!"

"…."

"DON'T IGNORE ME I LOVE YOU!"

"More like obsessed"

"FUCK YOU BEAN BANDIT FUCK YOU AND THAT FAT WHORE YOU CALL A BROTHER!"

"BITCH!"

"Wrath stop, you let her get to you to much!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Winry shrill laugh echoed around the home sending shivers up the people who bared witness spines.

"Lets get out of here" the man from before growled.

"Yes sir" the others spoke in unison dragged a laughing Winry out of the kitchen and into the night, Pinako watched them "May I visit her?" the man nodded "Yes once we stabilize her, we will call when we deem her sane enough to have visitors" the others threw the screaming blonde girl into the back of the armored vehicle, the back was filled with padded walls just so she wouldn't hurt herself they supposed.

"GRANNY!"

"I'm sorry dear"

"NO IF YOU WERE SORRY YOU WOULDN'T LET THEM DO THIS TO ME!"

"…" the words hit home for the old woman, she cried silently as they slammed the door on Winry screams Al came up behind her placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You gonna be ok Granny?" she nodded "Yeah I'll be fine, I think" she whispered. "We'll be gone first thing in the morning" he added "Yeah we don't want to impose on you any longer" Ed said.

"It's alright, you don't have to go so soon"

"No we've over stayed our welcome"

"Well if you think you really should"

"Don't worry, we'll come back to visit" Al said.

"Yeah we don't want you getting to lonely"

Pinako nodded sadly, she was gonna be all alone in the big house. She quietly walked back into the house with the others after the armored truck rolled towards Resembol. Ed and Al watched sadly as she lumbered up the steps to her room, she was upset to such an extent she didn't want any comfort from anyone. Al slumped into one of the armchairs rubbing his face the stress of the day made him look older then he really was.

"Al?"

"Hmm?"

"You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine why do you ask?"

"Don't give me that, we're all a family like you said, so you can tell us everything"

"Its Granny, I worry about her sanity after all this"

"Aww come on Al, Gran's tougher then that, I'm sure she can handle being here by herself till the white coats say blondie is sane enough to come home"

"I don't know brother…"

"Alphonse drop it, now go upstairs and pack we leave in the morning"

"Chibi, don't be so hard on him"

"I know, I know koi but he needs to get it that its not always supposed to rest on his shoulders"

"Well he took after you in some form or another"

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm mean you're worry to, you may not let it show, but you're worried about Pinako just as much as he is"

"Yeah I guess you're right, but Winry shouldn't of did all that she's done, none of this would've happened"

The Sin nodded, taking his boyfriends hand in his. Wrath was quiet, his mind drifting off just slightly. The rest of the night was quiet. Envy had went to bed, complaining of nausea and cramps. Wrath said he would pack up the rest of the clothes, only Ed and Al remained in the living room after the younger blonde returned from packing his clothes and possessions.

"Onii-chan?"

"Hmm?"

"Do think it was the right thing to do?"

"Yeah she needed help" he said knowing full well who the younger Elric was talking about.

"I know that, but maybe I should of just-"

"No you did the right thing, you weren't happy with her so don't go thinking its all your fault"

"But nii-san-"

"Al I am not going to have this conversation! You're coming home with me, Wrath and Envy where you belong! Now go upstairs and rest!" Ed ordered.

"Alright nii-san" he murmured getting up from his seat to clamber up the stairs.

The next morning, the house was somber. Pinako had done her daily routine, get out of bed, went down stairs and made breakfast. Ed was the first one down, he sent the woman a small smile while taking his seat at the table.

"When does the train leave?"

"At 10"

"Oh well I just wanted to know"

Another set of footsteps signified another arrival at the table, the two looked up to see it was Alphonse. The younger Elric sat across from his brother, Pinako set their food in front of them while taking her own seat. Wrath and Envy came down 10 minutes later, Envy rested his head on the table.

"Envy did you not go to sleep?"

"Yeah I went to sleep but I had a lovely visit from my friend morning sickness!"

"Seems you are one of the unlucky ones who has it the whole pregnancy" Pinako said.

Envy rolled his eyes tiredly. "Yeah and its pure hell" he growled.

"Guys come on its 9:30 we gotta get going" Ed said looking at the kitchen clock hanging over the archway. Pinako got up from her seat grabbing her car keys "Come on then, I'll drive you all to the train station" she said they all nodded.

On the way they had rode past the Asylum where Winry was being kept. Ed dared a small glance at the dark, creepy and desolate building. He felt bad for her, though he didn't know why. Maybe because deep down he did care about her? Maybe, maybe not. It was just a common human feeling to hurt for someone who is getting their brain tested to see if they were sane. Pinako's car pulled up in front of the station and she helped them load their luggage.

"Don't forget to come visit, and send me pictures of the kids Ed"

"I wont granny"

"And Envy you take good care of yourself"

"Yeah"

"Al I hope you and Wrath are happy together"

"We are, I'll miss not living with you granny"

As the train pulled away the group caught a small glance of Pinako's smiling, wrinkled face. She seemed happy but still a bit sad deep down. The ride home to Central short one, Ed and Envy arguing childishly about what they were going to name the babies. Wrath and Al discussing their future plans and the baby on way. When the finally got home, Al and Wrath went straight to bed, Ed and Envy stayed up for bit still discussing names.

"Ok how about for two boys, Lance and Alexander?" Ed asked.

"No way, I want to name the boys William and Viktor!"

"Hell no those are horrible names!"

"Grrrrr Edo, those names are perfect!" Envy hissed with small tears sliding down his cheeks.

"Fine, fine ok girl names?"

"How about Esther and Yami?"

"A….? Wasn't Yami the name of a Hindu goddess?"

"Uh… yeah never mind about that one um Erika and Nikola?"

"Hmmm yeah I like those two"

"Okay then its Erika and Nikola for girls"

"Ok boy and girl?"

"Nikola and Alexander if its girl and boy"

"Yeah that will work"

When they finally set on two names they went upstairs to bed. But on their way up the stairs Ed tripped falling on Envy his crotch at the Sin's rear. The blonde boy blushed when all the blood rushed south to his groin. Envy stiffened when he felt the growing erection graze his butt.

"Edward!" he growled dangerously

"What? Its not my fault your so cute"

"Grrr get off me now!"

"Stop yelling Wrath and Al are asleep"

"Shut up bastard!"

"Envy I am sorry!" Ed whimpered when the Sin attempted to bite him.

"Just get off right now!"

"Why you could just-"

"Ed!"

"Please just one time, then I will never ask for any more sex"

Envy glared dryly at him for a moment, contemplating his options at this point. Help the blonde get off so that he would leave him alone, or just let him suffer. He groaned tiredly before nodding.

"Comere!" he growled shoving the blonde boy into their bedroom, tossing him onto the bed.

Ed stared at Envy as the Sin made short work of removing his pants, a pale hand sliding down towards his balls. Envy took off his lover's boxers, Ed hissed when the cool air from the A/C attacked his skin. But the cold was soon replaced by the warm heat of Envy's mouth. The Sin's head bobbed up and down, stopping a few times to give a good suck or two. Edward moaned gripping Envy's green hair and pulled his face further into his groin, trying to get the Sin to take his entire length into his mouth. After what seemed like forever Envy sucked hard and Ed released into his lover's mouth. Envy swallowed his boyfriend's seed and sat up smirking at Edward's dazed expression.

"Ne Hanage o'chibi-chan you ok?"

"Mpt"

"And what the hell does that mean?"

"Means I wish we could have actual sex!"

"You horny bastard, you know we can't now stop moaning"

"I know, I know bastard now lets just go to sleep" he pouted.

And for once they did just that.

* * *

*Sobs* I don't like this chapter very much I mean it was pure and utter crack. But I am just the author its up to you my faithful readers to decide what happens if it will continue or not :I because while writing this chapter I had writers block (damn you) and I don't know if this chapter turned out very good.

And no I couldn't kill Winry because well I need her as a villain for a possible sequel to this story if you guys think I should make a sequel its really up to you! So if you love this poor little author you will R&R ok huggles ppl :(


	9. One Month to Go

The Unexpected ch 8 :D

IT LIVES!

Wha? Oh yea the fic to :D only one more chapter then the epilogue followed by possible sequel but only if you guys request it okay :D

**Disclaimer: Yeah I own jack shit dammit :(**

Chapter 8 One Month to Go

4 months after Winry's much over due lock up at Resembol Asylum, Edward was busy at Central Command. It had taken a while but he finally been boosted up a few ranks. He was now Col. Edward Elric. However his mind wasn't entirely focused on his work, he kept drifting off thinking about the now 8 month pregnant Envy. The Sin was getting more and more tired and he had been complaining of cramps.

"Elric, stop day dreaming!"

Ed was knocked out of his stupor by Brig. General Mustang who was glaring down at his subordinate with irritation. "What the hell do you want Mustang?" he growled, the raven haired man glared even harder.

"You need to finish your paper work!"

"I am aware of that bastard"

"Then why aren't you doing it, hmm?"

"I have just been thinking about other things" he mumbled fingering the small silver chain around his wrist. The motion didn't go un noticed by Roy who smiled faintly.

"Thinking about Envy?"

"Yeah obviously he is having my children in another month"

"God that is just a horrible thought"

"What is?"

"You, him having kids, I can just imagine it they'll be balls of green and gold energy and sadistic just like their parents"

"Shut it Mustang"

"Come now FullMetal I only speak the truth"

Ed glared at his superior with pure annoyance. He was about to snap something else when his office phone came to life. He made a move to grab it thinking it was his lover, but Roy grabbed the receiver before he could even touch it.

"Hello, you've reached Col. Edward Elric's office" a voice on the other end sounded angry and irritated.

Roy pulled the phone away from his ear quickly when the person on the end screamed something into the phone that the blonde boy could only translate as "_FUCK OFF FLAME BOY_".

"It's for you" he groaned rubbing his aching ear.

"Yeah?"

"Edo do you think you could get me some ice cream when you get off work?"

"Envy how many times have I told you, don't call me at work unless its an emergency!"

"But this is an emergency!"

"Ice cream is not an emergency" he muttered dryly.

"Maybe not to you, but to an 8 month pregnant person it's a code red!" Envy shouted.

Edward groaned pinching the bridge of his nose, feeling a headache coming on. Envy was quiet waiting for his boyfriend's response, with bated breath. "Fine what flavor?" the green haired homunculus shouted happily acting so unlike himself but it was due to the hormones.

"I want blueberries n' cream!"

"Eh? What kinda flavor is that?"

"A new kind I hear its really good"

"Ugh whatever if I can find it I will buy but if not what do you want has a substitution?"

"Hmmm a how about strawberry"

"Alright is that it?"

"Yep"

"Ok see ya at home then" and he hung up running his gloved hands through his hair "Envy has been running you up walls huh?" Roy asked smirking, leaning against the wall. Ed nodded with a pained frown on his face.

"Yeah he's driving me insane!"

"Hn that's why I'm glad I use protection"

"Oh shut up"

"Just be happy one more month, one more month Elric and it will all be over"

"Yeah at the end of the tunnel my sons, or daughters will be here"

"Oh the horror!"

"Fuck you Mustang"

Roy stopped laughing and went to retort something but was cut off by a knock at the door.

"Come in!"

The door opened and in stepped Major. General Riza, in her arms were stacks of paperwork. "Aww come on Major. General-" she glared at him "Just finish sighing these and then you can go home Edward!" she said in "No nonsense" tone. Setting the giant stack of papers down on his desk.

"Anyways Edward, how as Envy been?"

"He's had better days, he barely sleeps cause the twins decide to practice kick ball in the middle of the night"

"Brutal" Roy said while shuddering.

"Yeah and guess what when he's cranky he takes it out on me!"

Riza smiled "Oh it'll be alright Edward-kun, once the babies are born Envy will return to his old self" he nodded "I hope so! I don't think I could stand constant hormone induced mood swings!" Roy snickered quietly at the blonde's predicament. "And by the way Roy" Riza muttered turning her serious brown eyes on him, he flinched that tone didn't sound good. "You're desk is about to be buried under all that work you left unfinished so you could come here and torture Edward" she grumbled pulling on her gun holster. Roy squeaked and ran out of the blonde chibi's office. Riza removed her hand from the holster and stared at young Colonel.

"I will see you tomorrow Col. Elric"

"Yeah see ya Major. General" she nodded giving a small wave and disappearing out the door.

An hour later Ed had finally finished the last of the assignments Hawkeye had given him, mostly the work was about upcoming banquets that the military hosted every year. He grabbed his trademark red coat from the coat rack and exited the office. In the hall he ran into Havoc and Hughes, the two were bickering about Elysia and Havoc's 1 year old son Noël.

"I'm telling you if you're son comes near my little Elysia he's gonna need a new leg!"

"Hughes how many times do I gotta tell ya Noël is 3 years younger then her trust me they won't be getting into anything with each other!"

"Hey guys"

The two men turned from arguing to see their favorite blonde boy.

"Hey Ed"

"Hi"

"Were you two seriously arguing about you're kids who I highly doubt are going to get involved with each other?"

"Yep"

"Uh huh"

Edward stared at them with a bored expression, "When's the babies due again Edo?" Jean asked scratching the golden mop on his head. "In August, Havoc" the man nodded "Wow you're kids are gonna be summer babies" the blonde boy rolled his eyes "So?" Hughes stared dumbly at him.

"So Ed! Summer babies are beautiful, vibrant children!"

"Great…"

"Hmm?"

"The kids will never leave me alone"

"Edward you need to take the situation seriously ok, you're boyfriend is going to be giving birth in another month and you are taking it all in stride or like it's a joke."

"Am not!"

"Are to!"

"Shut up already you two!" a new voice snapped. The three men turned around to see General Oliver Armstrong. The blonde woman's face was set in a permanent scowl of annoyance. "Ge-g-eneral!" Havoc she glared at him shutting up his ramblings, "Save it Lt. Havoc I don't have time for you!" she growled stomping past them, down the hall towards Fuhrer Bradley's office in a huff.

"Well can you say rude" Maes huffed.

"Armstrong's aren't know for their great manners"

"Yes I supposed"

"Think the only one with manners is the Lt. Colonel" Havoc said.

"Yeah but sometimes even he can be a bit rude"

"On rare occasions, anyways Edward I think you need to take this a lot more seriously then you are right now!"

Ed gave the older raven haired man a dry look. But then his face broke out in a panic "Aw damnit" the older men blinked curiously at him. "I almost forgot, I gotta go get Envy his ice cream or he'll castrate me!" he groaned running off "Good luck chief" Havoc shouted after the blonde. Ed jumped into his car and drove to the local grocery store.

"Excuse me, do you guys sell blueberries n' cream ice cream?" he asked the clerk when he entered the store.

"Um I'm not sure let me check our inventory" she said pulled up a clipboard. "Ooh you're in luck we just a got a new shipment of it in today" .

"Thanks" he said walking to the back of the store towards the frozen foods section. He opened the cooler door, grabbed the carton of the disgusting looking treat. Envy's cravings were going to be the death of him swore. He returned to the check out line and paid for the ice cream.

"That will be 9:99 sir"

"Damn for some ice cream?" he asked fishing his wallet out of his pocket.

"Yeah I know outrageous but that's the national price the company set for it"

"Well they aren't gonna make much" Ed grumbled taking the purchase from her and leaving out of the store and returned to his car. When he arrived home, he noticed that the front door was open. Frowning he got out of the car and went up the stairs. He saw Envy lying on the couch with a bag of ice on his head.

"Envy-koi you okay?" Ed asked, the Sin looked up.

"No it's hot as Hell!"

"Well why do you have the front door open then? You're just letting more hot air in"

"Wrath left it open"

"So you still could've of shut it"

"To lazy"

"I can see that"

"Shut up, and where is my ice cream?"

"Here don't start yelling!"

The Sin grabbed the tub of ice cream from his lover and proceeded to the kitchen. Edward watched in disgust as Envy dumped almost half the tub into a bowl and then mixed it with salt and hot sauce. The green haired Sin then dug his spoon into the nasty concoction, and moaned erotically about the taste.

He finished the meal in under 5 minutes.

"Gross…"

"Hey don't knock it till you try it"

"I'll pass"

"Suit you're self"

An hour later the ice cream carton laid in the trash can, licked clean of It's contents. And Envy lying on the couch with a belly ache.

"I told you not to do that"

"Ugh.."

"Don't throw up please!"

Envy was most likely about to snap something but the front door opening and closing silenced his oncoming tirade. A tired Alphonse stepped into the living room, his arms full of shopping bags. Obviously their baby was a girl, if the girly items in the bags were any indication. He and Envy had decided to keep the twins genders a secret, just let the babies surprise them.

"Where's Wrath?"

"I'm right here" they turned around to see the 4 month pregnant boy holding even MORE shopping bags.

"Damn did you guys buy the whole store?"

"He wanted to but I don't think my State Alchemist fund would cover it" Al groaned

"Wrath!" Envy growled

"What?"

"Don't spoil the brat before it's even born yet!"

"Bu-bu-but it's our first b-ba-ba-by! And its our little girl!"

"I don't care"

"Nii-san your so mean!" Wrath whined dropping the bags and running up the stairs, slamming his and Al's bedroom door. Envy felt to angry stares on him so he looked up to see Al giving him a stern look while his boyfriend was glaring.

"What?"

"Envy you know that he is in the same boat as you and can't control his emotions!"

"So that doesn't mean he should spoil my niece before she's even born, and besides that supposed to be the aunts or uncles job!" Envy said smirking. Ed still didn't look amused but he would let it slide this time. Al walked out of the room telling the couple he was going to check up on the raven haired boy.

Ed sat down beside his lover, setting the Sin's head so that he was lying on the blonde boy's lap. The FullMetal boy sat a hand on Envy's bloated belly and rubbed gentle circles into the stretched skin. He heard a soft, tired, sigh escape the pregnant homunculi's lips. He looked down saw that the Sin's eyes were closed just slightly.

"You tired?"

"A little"

"Go to sleep, I won't let anything happen to you"

"Hmmm"

Later at night, after everyone had went to sleep. That is till the left bedside table lamp flicked on. Envy sat up rubbing his bloated tummy, he had to pee. He climbed to his feet, hissing as the swollen joints screamed their protest at him moving around. The Sin waddled to the bathroom opening the door, but he didn't really have time to think about going to the bathroom when he felt a painful pressure in his lower abdomen. (A/N. What's wrong with Envy? Though you probably can take a guess :) ) .

He whimpered pressing the heal of his hand into top of the curve. He settled down on the floor when the pain became to much for his small form to handle. Slender fingers rubbed comforting circles into the pale, stretched skin. The pain would go away for a minute or two before it returned just as strong as before. When a particularly strong tremor struck him, he screamed back arching just slightly.

In the bedroom Edward shot up from bed when he heard the blood curdling scream, he bolted from bed and shot to the bathroom where the scream came from. His golden eyes widened to the size of dinner plates at the sight of Envy on the floor holding his large middle panting and seething.

"Envy what?"

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK IS THE FUCKING MATTER YOU STUPID CHIBI!"

"ALPHONSE!" said blonde came running to the bathroom and took in the sight of Envy in labor.

"Um I should probably call the ambulance right…"

"YEAH WOULD BE HELPFUL!" Envy screamed.

Wrath had awoken to the loud screams and death threats. He helped the green haired Sin off the floor, the raven was actually pretty calm. Maybe it was because in 5 months he to would be dealing with the pains of child birth. "Hello is this Dr. Hamilton's office?" Al shouted rather loudly into the phone, a muffled reply came and the younger blonde sighed in relief.

"Could you please put her on?"

"_Hello, this is Dr. Zita how may I help you?"_

"Ms. Zita, this is Alphonse Elric, Edward Elric's younger brother you remember me right?" he asked shrilly.

"_Yes you were with that rude and obnoxious blonde girl am I correct?"_

"Very but we really have more pressing matters ENVY-SAN IS HAVING THE BABIES!" he shouted the last bit into the phone. He heard a loud gasp on the other end of the phone, _"Hurry and bring him to the office he needs medical care immediately!" _Zita ordered "Ok!" and he hung up. His brother was helping Envy down the stairs when he turned back around.

"Al go pack some over night clothes for Envy! Wrath help me get him to the car!" Ed ordered.

"Alright nii-san!"

"Ok Ed-san!"

When the finally got Envy into the car, Alphonse came bounding down the front stairs, a large suitcase in his hand. Once the carryon was in the trunk the small family climbed into the car, while Al drived Ed and Wrath sat in the back seat saying kind and comforting words to the laboring homunculus.

"Envy stop that!" Ed shouted when Envy tried to spread his legs.

"YOU THINK I AM DOING THIS ON PURPOSE YOU STUPID BASTARD!"

"OUCH DAMMIT DON'T BITE ME!"

"I WILL DO AS I PLEASE!"

"Envy-nii-san stop you need to breath you know like the lady at the Lamaze place told you to!"

"FUCK!" Envy snarled while gripping his belly as another contraction hit him.

"Here take my hand Envy"

"Uh Ed I woul-"

To late, because soon as Envy's and Edward's palms connected the older Sin applied bone cracking force to his boyfriend's hand. "OW OW OW DAMMIT ENVY!" Ed shouted in pain as he felt the joints in his hand snap. "YOU DID THIS TO ME, EQUVILENT EXCHANGE BASTARD!" Alphonse stopped the car in front of Zita's clinic, the brown haired woman was already outside waiting for them with her scrubs already on.

"Hurry he's in a lot of pain!"

"I can see that Alphonse-kun" he blushed.

"Janette get off your lazy ass and help me!" Zita growled at the blonde woman.

"Eh?"

"Shut up and get over here!"

"Yes mam!"

While Al and Wrath stayed behind in the waiting room while Ed, Janette, and Zita swished a cursing and howling Envy behind the glass doors out of the twos sight. Ed sat Envy down on the examination table, while Janette put the pained Sin's legs up on the stirrups.

"ED I HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!" Envy screamed.

"Just calm down Envy-chan and it will all be over!"

"DON'T YOU CALL ME ENVY-**CHAN** YOU SONHAVABITCH!" Envy snarled even louder grabbing a hold of Ed's hair and pulling the blonde's face to his own. "YOU'RE PENIS IS SO GOING TO GET CUT OFF WHEN I CAN WALK YOU HERE ME?" Edward flinched.

"Envy stop it let go of him, so I can get the children out!" Zita said untangling Envy's pale fingers from Ed's blonde locks.

"JUST HURRY UP SO I CAN CUT HIS BALLS OFF!"

"Hmmm I'm making the cut it might hurt for a moment" she said he nodded the sweat poured down his face in waves from the pain. Zita picked up the scalpel, clean, flashing in the bright fluorescent light of the room.

The blade descended…..

* * *

Once again I am going to be an evil little chibi and cut it off their *evil smile*

Oh it's so sad that this story is almost over but all things must come to an end eventually. The babies genders have already been decided and the names picked. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and will wait for me to finished the last two chapters ok huggles :D

Almost forgot thanks go out to….

**Koneko-chan717**

**Takuya-san**

**Jrlock-san**

**BurningWhiteTwilight-san**

**And…. Nitakiya-san **:D you guys are the best


	10. New Family

The Unexpected Ch 9 :D

(Cries) THIS STORY IS ALMOST OVER I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, IT'S SO SAD! I had a lot of fun typing this story out, and I apologize for my typing errors that I have noticed after reading over the chapters myself. And oh there will be a special guest appearance in this chapter J. Anyway on with the disclaimer.

**DICALIMER: Yeah when I own FullMetal Alchemist, Hell will freeze over….

* * *

**

Chapter 9 New Family

_Previously…._

_The blade descended…_

Ed grunted when the Sin gripped his hand again and squeezed it in a Anaconda like grip. Envy panted weakly as a small amount of blood poured out of the incision Zita had made across his bloated belly. The brunette smiled apologetically.

"It's okay Envy just breath, it will all be over soon"

"I'm trying"

"I know, I know" she reasoned.

"Just hurry up and get them out of me!"

Zita nodded pulling the flesh back just a bit, she heard the laboring boy wince at the action. She slipped her gloved fingers inside of him, searching for the child heavy womb. Her fingers brushed something that resembled a head and gripped it gently. Baby 1.

"Wow he's stubborn!" she said trying to pry the infant from it's mother's innards.

"JUST GET HIM OUT DAMMIT!"

"I'm trying Envy! But the baby is just a stubborn as you and Edward!"

"MORE LIKE JUST AS STUBBORN AS IT'S DAMN FATHER!"

"HEY I'M RIGHT HERE YA KNOW!" Ed snapped after being so quiet for so long.

"IT'S TRUE DON'T DANIE IT!"

"LOOK WHO IS TALKING DANILE THY NAME IS ENVY!"

"FUCK YOU!"

"OH WELL WE HAVE TO WAIT TILL YOU HAVE THE BABIES THEN WITH PLEASURE!"

"PEV-V-VERT!" Envy stammered.

"TOUCHE REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE 2 MONTHS PREGNANT?"

Zita ignored the bickering teens, maybe while they were fighting or discussing she could get the child out. With a final tug, the newborn baby was removed from the Sin's stomach. Janette who had been quiet watching the scene was dazed at the beautiful child in the Dr.'s arms she hadn't heard Zita call her name.

"Janette!"

"Huh?"

"Could you please clean the infant off!"

"Oh yes right sorry I just blacked out for a minute"

Envy and Edward stopped bickering when they saw Janette carry their first born child away.

"My baby….."

"What is it, girl or boy?"

"I don't know we just gotta wait for that blonde chick brings it back in" Envy murmured dazedly.

"Envy I am gonna go in for baby 2"

"Okay"

And the brunette's hands went back to work, inching the other baby out slowly so as to not arm the infant. When Janette came back in, the baby was wrapped up in a blue blanket. A boy.

"You two have a healthy baby boy"

"Edo.."

"I know, can I hold my son?"

"Of course you can" she smiled handing the child to it's father.

"Damn somebody really loves his mommy!"

"HUH? I AM NOT A MOMMY!"

"Envy you did carry the babies-"

"OH YOU SHUT UP I DON'T CARE IF I DID CARRY THEM I AM A DAD NOT A MOTHER!"

"Anyway this baby really is attached to you Envy he won't come out!"

"Um isn't that bad if he doesn't come out?"

"Yeah he could suffocate and you could suffer internal bleeding"

Envy paled, hands went to the slowly flatting bugle of his stomach and gulped. He looked like he wanted to scream, vomit, and run away if he could at the same time. Zita sweated a little, she probably shouldn't of said that.

"Oh not that it will happen to you, no way"

"I HOPE NOT!"

"I would never let anything happen to you or your children, I promised you that and I keep my promises'"

Envy nearly screamed when he felt another contraction fly over his loins, he didn't understand how women put up with the pain. He wished Zita would get the last baby out of him so that he could his hold children. But the baby was being particularly stubborn, they were defiantly their father's child. As another contraction attack his lower half, a loud wail echoed off the walls. The final baby had finally been born.

"It's a girl!"

Oh that was different. Envy was kinda scared he didn't know how to deal with girls. The only he knew how to do was beat the hell out them, he's very good at that, but not how to care for them. While Zita cleaned the baby girl off, Ed handed his lover their first born, their son. The child snuggled into the warmth of his 'mother's' arms and yawned cutely.

"He looks like you" Ed whispered rubbing a gentle hand on the baby's head. And Edward was right, the child did look like the Sin. His slanted, feline like violet eyes were all Envy. As well as his skin color which was a creamy pale pink color. But the barley visible golden blonde hairs a top his head were inherited from Edward.

"What did you want to name him?"

"I want to name him, Viktor, Viktor James Elric"

"Yeah I think it fits, what do you think Viktor?" Viktor cooed making small grabbing motions at his parents, his little pudgy feet kicking in the air.

"Hey don't forget this little one!" Zita said walking up alongside the couple to show them the only female of their small family. The brunette set the baby girl down in Envy other arm that wasn't occupied by her older brother. The little girl was the exact opposite of her older twin, instead of violet eyes, her huge bright golden irises were all Edward. Her skin was a beautiful tan, and her hair was a dark black with a light emerald green hidden within the small tendrils.

"And this is Nikola, Nikola Trisha Elric"

"Are you sure, we could of named her Erika?"

"Yeah I'm sure, and besides" Envy said looking down at young Nikola smiling "She seems to like it"

"Hmmm, your right and thank you" Ed whispered.

"For what?"

"For giving me two beautiful children, and naming the little girl after my mother"

"You're very welcome"

Wrath and Alphonse entered the small delivery room, smiles almost permanently etched into their faces upon the sight of the two little beings nestled in Envy's arms. The older Sin smiled up at the two before looking back down at his daughter and son.

"Wh-w-wh-at a um, names?" Al asked timidly.

"Nikola and Viktor" Ed answered.

"Those are beautiful names nii-san"

"I didn't pick them Envy did"

"Oh still beautiful Envy-san"

Envy nodded, the small family was so caught up in talking of the birth to notice another person had entered the room. That person was dressed in knee high black stiletto boots. A slightly revealing dress, arm warmers with two nods running down each arm. (A/N. Take a guess at who it is, I told you guys in chapter 6 who would be possibly showing up later on :D).

Lust had decided to pay her older "brother" a visit. But what she saw had shocked her very being, in the male's arms were two new born babies. Both baring scary similarities to her brother and the FullMetal boy. The others still hadn't noticed her, maybe she could sneak back out without being noticed. But of course her luck was about as good as an expired driver's license.

"Lust?" Wrath gaped at his older sister.

"Um hi?" she said nervously, Lust they had all thought died when Wrath sealed her up when she had attempted to seal Sloth. But no here the busty black/brown haired woman stood before them perfectly fine, no sign of ever losing any stones.

"I THOUGHT WRATH SEALED YOU?" Envy shouted, but then he quieted down when he saw his children being to stir in his arms, he didn't want to wake them so he kept his voice to a minimum.

"He didn't do a very good job of it" she muttered dryly.

"There's no way, I sealed you I saw you die!"

"Yeah you thought I was dead, guess what I lived, I managed to crawl away from the circle after you left and I had gotten some stones from you're friend Dr. Marcoh he was ever so kind to me, he even offered to help me become human."

The group was staring at her as if she had grown another head, how could she of survived? Maybe it was her will to become human that had kept her alive, or was it the leftover stones inside her? They probably would never know.

"Anyway could I possibly hold my niece or nephew?"

"You expect me to just let you hold my children after you just randomly show up again after being supposed to be dead for 2 going on 3 years?"

"I know I have some explaining to do, but please Envy may I?"

"Fine but don't try anything funny!" he growled shifting his arm a little so that his sister could take the boy out of his arm.

After a few more moments of holding her nephew Lust handed baby Viktor back to his father, Ed watched her from the corner of his eye while still checking over their son to make sure the busty woman hadn't done anything to the precious boy. But he couldn't find anything wrong with him so he gave Envy a curt nod that she wasn't going to harm their family.

"Ok but really Lust how did you manage to live after losing so many stones?"

"To tell you the truth I don't know myself, I figured it was because little momma's boy over there" she said jabbing a thumb at Wrath who growled at her "Didn't seal me the right way, and I guess maybe that was the case but we will never know".

"It makes sense, Wrath you always were to brash when you were doing something important"

"Hey who's side are you on?"

"Um yours?"

"You betta be!"

"Guys stop getting loud" Envy snarled quietly while looking down at Nikola then over at Viktor.

Wrath, Al and Lust all became silent. "We're sorry nii-san" Wrath whispered, the other two nodded with small smiles on their faces. The same thought was going through their heads, Envy being maternal was kinda frightening. They had never thought of him to be a parent because of his destructive nature. But here the infamous Envy sat cuddling up with his lover and their children nestled in his arms like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Zita had re entered the room, a clipboard in her arms. "Envy you and the children will have to stay here for the night, just to make sure all three of you are alright" he nodded "Alright, I'll see you all tomorrow then" Ed leaned down and pecked the Sin on the cheek.

"Behave"

"Yeah, yeah" Envy said sarcastically while rolling his lavender eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at me, I don't want to come back here tomorrow and find half the clinic half way to Xing!"

"I'll be good chibi" he cooed.

"You better" Ed said kissing him again, then placed a kiss on each of their children's noses before walking out of the room with Wrath, Alphonse and Lust on his heels. The blonde looked back at Lust as his brother and his lover got into the car "Do you want to come with us?" she shrugged "I suppose if you don't mind of course Edward-kun" he smirked "You are my boyfriend's sister and the kids have a right to know their aunt Lust-san, so come on" he said motioning for her to enter the car. She smiled and sat down in the back seat with Wrath.

When the got to Ed's apartment, another car, the Major. General's car to be exact was parked out front. The group blinked getting out and walked up the front steps, they saw Riza and Mustang standing in front of the door. The two military generals turned around when they heard footsteps behind them.

"Hange no' where have you been?"

"At the hospital!"

"The hospital? Why the hell were you there?"

"Sir" Riza started dryly before turning to look at her raven haired superior "What do you think he was there for think about it for a minute, have you not noticed that Envy-san isn't with them"

The awe came over Roy's face and his jaw dropped. "Are you serious? The twins were born!"

"Yeah"

"Woah that's amazing FullMetal"

"I know I'm very happy"

"I THINK THIS CALLS FOR A PARTY!"

"I think not sir, you have work to finish"

"Awww come on Hawkeye, can't I have a break?"

A loud click of the blonde woman's gun being cocked answered Roy's question. He squeaked and ran past the woman towards her car, she smiled before turning back to look at family "I am very proud of you Edward, I know you'll be a very good father to those children" she said placing a comforting hand on his shoulder and walked towards her car then pulled away.

"Nii-san don't forget to call Granny" Al said when they got in the house"

"Oh yeah I almost forgot"

Ed grabbed the phone and dialed the old woman's number, "_Hello you've reached Rockbell Automail Maintenance and Installment I am Pinako Rockbell how may I help you?_" Pinako said he smiled "Granny?" a small gasp met his ear "_Ed? Is that you?_" she asked "Yeah it's me, I have some news for you and I hope you won't mind traveling up to Central to see it" it was quiet for a minute "_What did you do?_" Ed snarled "I didn't do anything, you sod up old hag!".

"_SURE YOU DIDN'T YOU LITTLE HALF PINT MIDGET!_"

"I GUESS THEN YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE YOUR GREAT GRAND CHIDLREN!"

"_OH SHU- Wait you mean….?_"

"Yep Envy gave birth tonight"

"_Oh my word, well give me the details you midget!_"

"A boy and a girl, you really should come to Central and see them their beautiful"

"_I wish I could, but who would take care of the shop for me while I'm away?_"

"Um I do you know anyone who could watch it for you, for at least a few days?"

"_I don't know maybe, I will see anyway what are their names?_"

"Viktor James and Nikola Trisha"

Pinako was quiet "_You're a good kid Ed, you're mother would be proud_" she said her voice seemed hoarse like she was on the verge of tears. "Yeah I know, I wish she was still here" he whispered. After discussing traveling expenses with Pinako, they hung up. He sat down on the couch and fell asleep.

The next day, he was awakened by a shrill screech coming from the kitchen. He bolted to said room thinking something horrible had happened but to his annoyance it was only a cat Al had snuck into the house who had been unlucky to get it's tail stepped on by Lust. She looked down at the cat in annoyance be for shaking the flailing animal off her boot.

"I hate animals"

"I don't hate cats I just hate it when Al sneaks them into the house"

"You let the boy get away with to much"

"No I don't"

"Yes you do, he was like a trial baby before the real babies arrived"

He blushed and denied it continuously. "Anyway when does Envy come home?" Lust asked, the blonde shrugged "I don't know, I hope soon" the woman nodded "Will that Doctor woman call if he is alright to come home with you?" he nodded.

"Oh and Lust I am going to be painting the babies nursery did you want to help?"

"I suppose"

"You suppose? You would do it those kids have gotten to you" he laughed.

"Maybe so, but still I could say no"

"But you won't"

"Shut up Elric, now where is this nursery?"

He snickered quietly before motioning for her to follow him upstairs towards an open door on the far left. In the room two white oak cribs stood against the wall, a large dresser, a pale tan carpet, an assort ion of children's toys. The room was perfect except, for it's painfully plain and barren white walls.

"You have very little creativity"

"Hey we didn't know the genders so we left it white!"

"Still a pale yellow would of sufficed"

"Oh well next time he gets pregnant we'll be sure to call you the personal home decorator!"

"No need to get snappy I was just saying"

He rolled his eyes going over to the buckets stacked up against the wall, "Ok the colors I bought are sky blue, heavenly yellow and mother earth green" he heard her scoff "What the matter with those colors?" she laughed "Oh come now Elric, all of those colors are to boyish and there is a girl in this family now so pick something that would be good for both of them!".

"So the yellow?"

"Yes that would be perfect not to boyish but then not to girly!"

"Alright if you say so" he said grabbing a screwdriver off the floor and uncapping the bucket of paint.

Lust picked a brush up and went to work, a few minutes into their work they heard new feet enter the room. "That's a great color nii-san" Al said in amazement, "Wow I thought he would of picked orange or something" Wrath muttered. Ed snorted "Give me a little credit Wrath" said boy just burst out laughing.

"Sorry Ed but you have about has much creativity as an ass!"

"Fuck you too"

"You didn't even pick the color I did!" Lust huffed.

"So!"

"Brat!"

"Why can't we all just get along?" Al asked they all looked at him like he was crazy.

"When that happens Hell will freeze over"

Their bickering was cut off by the ringing of the telephone, Ed bolted pass them and down the stairs to the phone. "Hello?" he asked slightly out of breath "_Ed?_" it was Zita. "Yeah it's me, so what's going on can Envy and the twins come home?" he heard her giggle "_Yes, yes they can come home Edward-kun but I must advise that you still keep you're hands to you're self just for a few weeks till Envy can get his strength back_" she informed him his jaw dropped "Aww come on Zita-",. "_No buts Ed, you can do it for a few weeks_" Zita said laughing "_Now get you're blonde butt down here you're family is waiting for you_" he smiled before hanging up on her. Ed turned around from the phone to see his slowly increasing family waiting behind him to hear the news.

"They can come home!"

"Finally I missed the overgrown palm tree" Lust said smiling.

"Don't ever let Envy hear you call him that"

"Why?"

"Wrath found that out the hard way"

Wrath shivered at the memory of having his older brother shove a dulled knife up his ass. Lust sweat dropped she really didn't want to know, they all walked out side and got into the car. When they got to Zita's clinic, Envy, holding two baby carryon's was outside waiting for them.

"Took ya long enough"

"Oh it did not, now comere and give me a kiss" Ed said wrapping his arms around the Sin and kissing him passionately.

"Edward, Envy what did I say about taking it easy!" Zita scolded them.

"Sorry Zita couldn't help it"

"I don't care just don't let it happen again"

The others laughed as the two boys got talked down to by the young woman, when she finally stopped giving them the lecture of the century she waved goodbye to them for now. At home Envy sat down in the rocking chair holding Nikola close to his chest, his tight fitting cropped top lay discarded on the nightstand. He was embarrassed to say the least when Zita had told him he was able to breastfeed, which was exactly what baby Nik was doing.

"You're so cute" a voice joked.

"EH? When did you get in here?" Envy asked when he looked up to see Ed leaning against the doorframe a smirk in place.

"A few minute ago"

"Stupid chibi what is so cute about me breastfeeding?"

"I don't know, it just makes you look soft"

"I am anything but soft"

"Oh come on, you are such a softy now you wouldn't hurt a fly"

Envy growled while pulling Nikola away from his chest, rubbing the slightly red nipple the kids had teeth already. "I'll take them off you're hands if you're tired" Ed offered the Sin shook his head rising to his feet, he put Nik back into her crib. "Nah I'm not tired, it's only the first day we still have the night after this" he said, Ed grinned this was going to be fun.

"Come on lets get some rest before they wake up" Ed said.

"Alright fine"

They walked quietly out of the twins bedroom, closing the door behind them with a soft click. The others had gone out shopping leaving the new parents alone at the apartment. Lust had become a permanent resident of the house, Ed and Wrath making her own room below the house. Edward and her got along just well and she excepted her new brother in laws with ease.

All putting the past behind them for the sake of the children, and the child to come…

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Look see I updated haha! I couldn't update till now because my laptop was being fixed again! So sorry for the long wait everyone, if the chapter is good review, if it is bad still review and tell me whats wrong with it plz and I will fix it or try to, the epilogue should be up by next week or two at the most so be patient

Love Kenni :D


	11. Epilogue

The Unexpected Epilogue :D

This is it, no more The Unexpected unless you guys want a sequel J

Disclaimer: I do have a job, but what I make doesn't cut it to own FMA L

Epilogue

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_10 Years later…._

In Risembool, the sun was beginning to rise above the trees and fields. A small home stood out like a star on a cloudless night, it's deep red paint, black shutters and small bedroom balcony gave it an elegant charm. A small family of four was still resting till a loud bark awoke them.

Edward Elric shot up from bed quickly eyes wide and searching around for any sign of an intruder. But to his annoyance it was only Sascha. The family dog, they gotten from Riza after Black Hyate breeded again.

"Sash what is it?" he grumbled tiredly while rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Envy was stirring a little, violet eyes flickering open a bit before they shot open. Said dog just barked again licking at the blonde's dangling hand. "He's hungry" Envy mumbled sleep gumming his voice.

"And you know this how?"

"I know because he was chewing you're boot" the Sin muttered pointing to said shoe which had a lovely set of teeth marks etched into the leather. "SASCHA!" Ed shouted jumping up from the bed and grabbed the boot off the floor and looked it over. He groaned letting the damaged footwear drop to the floor. Envy gave him an annoyed look sitting up in bed, "You can fix it so stop moaning" Ed just rolled his eyes.

"DON'T ROLL YOU'RE EYES AT ME CHIBI!"

"WHO YOU CALLIN A MOUTHY LITTLE PIPSQUEAK YOU PALMTREE?"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A SEXY PALMTREE!"

"Dad" a voice grumbled from the doorway. The lovers turned from snarling at each other to see a sleepy Viktor rubbing his eyes. The boy's golden blonde hair now stuck out in odd angles like Envy's and his slanted purple eyes turned a bright lavender when the sun hit them the right way.

"Oh sorry did we wake you?"

"No Nikky did"

"Hmph you needed to get up soon anyway, and speaking of Nikky where is my baby girl?"

"Right here momma!"

"NIK HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO CALL ME MOMMA?"

"Hmmm don't remember"

"Probably good a 500 hundred times"

"SHUT UP YOU STUPID CHIBI IT'S YOU'RE FAULT THEY CALL ME MOMMA IN THE FIRST PLACE!"

Ed smirked, he remembered the incident all to well…

**FLASHBACK FLASHBACK FLASHBACK**

_A 20 year old Edward was in the kitchen when Envy came out of the twins' bedroom holding the three year olds in his arms. Ed smiled at the Sin softly, the Homunculus smirked at him before handing Nikola over to her father. Nik was such a daddy's girl, but the blonde man didn't mind. _

"_So did they sleep well?"_

"_Yeah but Vik was a little cranky"_

"_Huh? Well he did inherit you're sleeping habits"_

"_Did not!" Envy growled "He got that from you ya stupid bastard!" Ed snorted adjusting Nikola on his hip. The Sin sent a sharp glare at him before turning back to their son. "Anyway I need to go shopping can I trust you enough to watch the twins while I'm gone?" he snapped over his shoulder, "Yeah I can" Ed grumbled today was not his day._

"_Good bit of advice don't let Nikky near the sink" he called over his shoulder before transforming in a womanly version of himself and waltzing out the door. Edward blinked. Why was she not allowed near the sink? But the blonde didn't have much time to ponder why when all of a sudden his arms felt soaked._

"_Nik?" he gaped at the baby half human half homunculus. Nikola had shifted her body to water! Just like the old Sloth used to do. But baby Nik only giggled at her father's frazzled appearance. She shifted in his arms a bit before sending her watery body out of his arms and towards the kitchen sink. _

"_NIKOLA TRISHA ELRIC GET OUT OF THERE!" he screamed._

"_Bobba!" a small voice cried from behind the blonde. Ed turned from the sink and Nikola to see Viktor wobbling over to his father. The blond quickly scooped the blonde baby up and turned back towards the sink to see his own golden eyes laughing at him. _

"_Come on Nik you're mom will get mad if he finds out I couldn't keep track of you!" he begged but the baby wouldn't budge._

"_NIK! YOUR MOMMA WILL HAVE MY NECK IF YOU DON'T COME OUT!" Nikola giggled and leaped out of the drain, settling into her father's arms and shifting back to normal. "Good girl" he said kissing her forehead and walking into the living room, Viktor made a giant spit bubble after his father put him and his sister down in their play pen._

"_Vik" Ed said sternly grabbing a tissue and wiping the saliva away. As he rose back to his feet he heard the front door open and the sound of bare feet scraping over the floorboards. _

"_Ed?" Envy was back, the blonde made sure the twins couldn't get out of the pen and walk to the hallway, the Sin was holding bags upon bags of clothes and food. "Did you buy the whole store or something?" the Homunculus rolled his eyes "Maybe and so what if I did? Not like you don't get paid enough" Edward groaned inwardly Envy was still angry at him._

"_Anyways how are the twins?"_

"_Their fine"_

"_Good, Vik and Nik dad's home" he called hearing the giggles and cries of joy from the lively half breed children. He entered the living room, their son making grabbing motions at him. Envy picked up the blonde baby and cradled him to his chest._

"_How's my Vik doin?" of course the child didn't respond with normal speech, just his effective blubbering._

"_Momma!" Envy's eyes shot open and looked down at the small figure still sitting in the crib, he blinked rapidly 'What did she just say?' he thought before voicing it turning to his boyfriend._

"_Nik say it again hun" the little girl clapped her hands and repeated it "Momma!" Envy stiffened "When did she ever, EVER call me MOMMA?" the Sin turned boiling violet eyes on his partner growling "DID YOU TEACH HER HOW TO SAY MOMMA?" he snarled Ed blanched and backed away from the snarling Homunculus with his hands up in defense._

"_Calm down it was an accident!"_

"_ACCIDENT? ACCIDENT MY DAUGHTER THINKS I'M A WOMAN!"_

"_I AM SO SORRY PLEASE DON'T HIT ME!"_

"_Oh don't worry I'm not gonna hit cha" he cooed placing Viktor back into the play pen, he placed a quick kiss on his lover's lips which made the blonde man relax somewhat. But just as soon as he went to turn around, he received a roundhouse kick to the stomach and sent flying through the wall._

_Envy glared at his unconscious form, dusting off his clothes picking the twins up and walk to the steps, calling over his shoulder "You sleep on the couch to night hope you don't mind love" he said nonchalantly and waltzed up the stairs._

_**FLASHBACK ENDS FLASHBACK ENDS FLASHBACK ENDS FLASHBACK ENDS FLASHBACK ENDS**_

"Hey I still got a bump on his head from when you kicked me through the wall!"

"Heh don't play the victim bastard"

"But I am!"

Viktor and Nikola stared at their parents with bored expressions used to the quarrels after so long of hearing them. But they were hungry therefore Ed had to get up and make them breakfast or they would turn into mini versions of their mother. And the blonde certainly didn't want that!

"Dad"

"We're"

"Hungry!" they said together and shouting over their mother and father's bickering. Ed shot them a pointed glare "We're busy talking Viktor and Nikola!" they both glared right back "But we're hungry daddy!" Nik whined brushing her wild brackish mane out of her giant golden orbs.

Ed groaned giving the Sin a defeated look. Envy nodded dryly and got out of bed grabbing a t-shirt off the floor and throwing it on and walking down the stairs with the twins, Ed and Sascha in toe. He got out eggs, ham and juice and set them on the counter. Ed and the twins were so caught up in their goofing off to notice Envy's green expression when he caught sight of the raw food and the smell of it.

When the food was done, he placed the food down in front of his family. Kissing Edward on the cheek whispering "Watch them and make sure they don't need anything else" and dashed quickly to the bathroom down the hall, Ed blinked at where the Sin had just been standing in confusion.

"Eat all of it! And Vik don't give any to Sascha or your cleaning up the mess he makes later understand?" Ed said when he got up to follow the green haired Homunculus. "Kay'" they replied, he wondered to the bathroom door only to hear low whimpers and moans escape the room. He knocked timidly "Koi? You ok in there?" he called but received only the flush of the toilet as an answer. The door opened with a creaking sound and revealed the disheveled male.

"You ok?" Ed asking cupping the pale sweat stained cheek. The Sin nodded weakly before shoving the tanned hand from his skin.

"Did they eat everything?"

"I don't know I was more worried about you"

"Don't have to worry about me! I am fine you stupid chibi our kids are always top priority!"

Envy growled and walked off with his arms crossed over his chest. Ed sighed running a hand through his golden locks, he walked back to the kitchen where the twins were putting their dirty plates in the sink. Envy was feeding Sascha the left over's in the pan. After the dishes were clean, the school bus honked loudly from outside.

"Bye momma" Nikola said giving her mother a tight hug and skipped off to the bus, her wild brackish locks flying behind her in two braids, she was dressed in a simple spring dress covered in a yellow flowers. "Mom are you going to pick us up or will dad?" the little blonde asked timidly Envy shrugged "I think you're dad has to go to the Southern HQ today so it will probably be me" Viktor nodded running to catch up with his sister.

When the kids were gone, Ed was getting dressed in his usual attire. Tight leather pants, red soled boots, (after being repaired) black tank top, over shirt and his famous jacket and almost as famous Flmael. Envy stood in the door way, his pale face unusually blank. He would usually make a comment on his lover's height or choice of clothing. His one arm was wrapped loosely around his lower stomach. Ed turned around from the mirror to see his lover and smiled softly "What's up koi?" the Sin just stood there.

Edward blinked in confusion "What's wrong do you feel sick again? I'll tell the Military that I can't make it to the meeting this morning-" Envy cut him off by walking up to him and kissing him roughly and passionately "No you need to go to work, I'll be fine it's I wanted to tell you something before you go" the blonde nodded "Alright what is it" the Homunculus bit his lower lip before speaking.

"You know how I vomited this morning?" Ed nodded again motioning with his hand for him to continue "Well I know why I did" he said arms unconsciously tighten around his belly "I'm pregnant again!" he heard a loud thud and looked down at his lover in annoyance.

"You would honestly think I would be the one fainting!" he grumbled. Envy kneeled down picking up his boyfriend and putting the man in his chair. The Sin went to the bathroom and filled their spitting cup up with water brought it back and dumped it all over the unconscious man. The blonde came to with a shudder.

"Ugh"

"Get up before your late bastard"

"How can you call me a bastard after what you just told me?"

"Because I can I'll do it again! Now get moving baka"

"We'll talk about this later then"

"Damn straight" Ed smirked and kissed the Sin on the lips tenderly before giving the male's belly a quick kiss. He looked over his shoulder smiling and left waving to his soon to be extended family.

* * *

Ew that sucked major ass :( I am sooooooooooooo soooooooooooooooooo very sorry that this epilogue took so long to be put out I promised it like a week at the most and I broke my promise I am so horrible *cries* but I think the squel will be better then the ending of this story, the squel will have Wrath, Al and all the others return plus the evil that is Winry! Once again so sorry everyone :( please don't hate me or throw rocks!

Bye much love _AmyaEnvyElric_


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